Saints and Angels
by JustAnotherFallen
Summary: Darcie McGinty has a life full of questionable activity. She is keeper of her father, their bar, and the amusing drunks in the neighborhood. The McManus brothers are both her friends, protectors, and one of the brothers has her heart. When the Russians step foot into McGinty's, Darcie's life gets turned upside-down.
1. Boston's Brothers

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Boondock Saints or any of the real characters. Even if sometimes I wish I did.**

"Murphy, Connor good to see you two." I smiled putting the shot glasses on the table pouring out the whisky.

Murphy raised his glass at me, his eyes dark. "Happy St. Paddy's day, Darcie." He and Connor shot back the whisky slamming the glasses back down.

The other guys at the bar began talking with dad but I noticed Murph glancing over at me.

I smiled and leaned forward on me elbows. "Something on your mind?"

A lazy smiled spread across his lips. "Aye. I was thinking that I miss seeing that lovely face of yours."

Murph and Connor were fraternal twins and nearly lived at my dad's bar. I adored them both and missed them when I wasn't working at the bar. Connor and I were friends and Murph and I were something a bit more. We weren't in love, as far as I could tell, but there was still an attraction. It was true we saw each other on occasion, even made out in the back storage room on occasion, but it's never gotten farther than that. Maybe it was slightly juvenile but I didn't care. My eyes did a quick survey of his attire. Tonight he was dressed in a large black sweater and tight jeans. Something extremely comfortable but he pulled it off in almost a classy way. He looked good no matter what he wore and when he spoke his brogue was heavy. Kissing him made my toes curl in my shoes and it was nice to lose the aggravation for a few minutes. I smiled watching him lean forward inches from me.

Murph tilted his head to the back room where we kept the extra liquor and glasses. He pushed back from his stool and walked to the door and went through.

I poured the rest of the whisky bottle into Connor's glass. "Oi, this one's finished looks like I need to get another bottle." It was an obvious thing to say but I didn't want Connor to notice Murph's disappearance and wonder if he had left.

Connor rolled his eyes at me. "Not noticeable at all there, Darcie." He groaned looking at his shot glass. "Maybe he'll have better luck with you than I did today."

I smiled and tossed the bar rag behind me. "Yeah Eddy came in earlier and told me about the jolly green feminist. Need some ice?"

He glared at me and muttered something under his breath.

I gave him a finger wave and headed toward the storage room. I closed the door behind me and turned to face the darkness. Before my eyes adjusted I felt hands at my waist and lips press against mine. I felt a spark in my stomach as the lips left mine.

Murph's voice was low with a little laugh in it. "Hi there."

I smiled tracing a finger over his lips. "You taste like whisky." I gave him a light kiss. "I like it."

He swayed his hips moving closer to me. "You know, I don't like how I miss you this much."

I felt my back press up against the door. "Oh, so you miss me now? Thinking more about me then you thought you would, I see."

Murph leaned in kissing my neck. "I miss you all the time. I think I'm gettin' attached to you." He reached behind him and grabbed a bottle of whisky. "We should probably get back out there."

I bit my lip. "Murph. We just got in here."

He gave a slight chuckled and nipped my lip. "I know love. But it's St. Paddy's Day and everyone out there is goin' to be lookin' for us." He lifted the hem of my shirt brushing his fingers across my stomach. "We don't always have all the time we want. But all I need is a few moments to be near you." He fixed my shirt and nodded to the door.

I turned and opened it walking out with him. I put the bottle on the counter and went to go around when he grabbed me around the waist laughing. "Oh no, you sit with me."

There were ten of us left in the bar drinking and laughing. I was warm all over from the whisky and Murph's hand which had been resting on my thigh for the better part of the night.

Dad bowed his head. "I've got some v-v-very bad news. I'm going to have to close down the bar. The Russians are buys up everything. They're not even letting me renew my lease. Fuck! Ass!"

My lips twitched trying not to smile. It was sad about the bar but dad's tourettes lightened the situation a bit. Everyone around me was trying to say something, mentioning family who would help out.

Dad just shook his head. "No I don't want anyone to know. You know what they say. People in glass houses s-s-sink ships."

We laughed. Dad had his own batch of proverbs no one could live up to.

Connor chuckled. "A bush saved is a penny earned."

Murph was laughing into the back of my neck waving a hand holding a cigarette on the counter. "And don't cross the road if you can't get out of the kitchen."

As if on cue the Russians entered the bar and I slid off Murph's laugh to stand by dad. I bent down feeling the shotgun beneath the bar just incase something happened. Well, the 'incase' was a lie. I took it in my hands standing up, still keeping it at waist level. Connor and Murph took a shot and looked at each other. Shit, I knew that look.

They threw their glasses down and went after Ivan. There were fists flying and I watched as Murph was thrown onto a back bench one of the larger guards went toward him. I made a move with the shotgun but Connor turned the barrel down. "Stay away he can take care of himself."

Murph reached behind his head grabbing two wine bottles from the fancy display and slammed them into wither side of the Russian's head. The man went down in an instant and I saw Murph wink at me as he stood up.

In minutes the intruders were subdued. Never match up the strength of angry drunk Irishmen to Russians who have threatened to close down their favorite bar.

Two of them had been knocked around and were tied to chairs by the door, while the third was tied to the bar. I leaned myself backward into Murph feeling his lips brush my neck. I took the cigarette from his hand taking a small drag watching as Connor poured a bottle onto the Russian's back.

Connor grabbed the cig from my hand flicking it onto the Russian's back. Flames licked at the shirt. "See smoking is dangerous."

Murph wrapped an arm around my waist watching the flames. "You ever seen them close by here, call us. I don't want them bothering you or your da'."

"Anything you say." My eyes moved down from the flames and rested on his hand on my stomach. Along the top of his hand and pointing toward his forefinger was tattooed 'Aequintas'-Justice. It fit. The brothers were family oriented. They knew sometimes the police couldn't do shit. If they promised to help us, they would.

I laced my fingers with his watching as Connor finally doused the flames.

We had thrown the Russian's out an hour ago and now I was closing up the bar having sent dad up a few minutes previously. Connor and Murph and volunteered to help me clean up and now were the last ones left. Connor watched at Murph moved slowly and threw up his hands. "Jesus, Murphy if you want to talk to her just do it. I'll be waitin' for you outside."

The door shut and I laughed as Murph ran over to me lifting me up in a spin. "Take care of yourself, right love?"

I nodded as he placed me back on my feet. "I like hearing you speak Russian, although I prefer Gaelic."

He raised an eyebrow. "Why's that?"

"I know Gaelic better than Russian. Plus some languages just sound better coming from your lips." I snaked my arms around his neck giving him a long kiss goodbye.

He reluctantly pulled back, sighing. "You make it harder and harder to leave every time."

"Then stay." I don't even know how it came out of my mouth. I mentally kicked myself in the head for saying it out loud let alone thinking about it.

He shook his head giving my neck one last kiss. "You know I won't." He said it strongly but his eyes gave away a thought that could have held him back. He held my face with his hands looking me in the eye. "I think I'm goin' to start visiting you more. Lovely girl like you should have a good guy around." He smiled and walked out the doors for his waiting brother.

I sighed leaning against the counter. There were a lot of things I'd do to have Murphy permanently in my life. I shook myself realizing what I was saying. Murphy wasn't the relationship type. Not that I knew of anyway. He and Connor lived together with just each other as company.

_He doesn't need a girl like me to ruin things for him. _I sighed. Even my subconscious was belittling. I locked the front door and made my way up the stairs to the small apartment above the bar. I took one last look at the bar and shut the lights feeling a tightening in my stomach as if something bad was brewing. _Stop being paranoid and go get some sleep._

Finally, one good idea.

**A/N: I don't know I was bored. This seemed like fun. Another one of my short fan fictions.**


	2. A Worried Angel

**Disclaimer: Some day I'll live in Boston. But until then I'm saving money and writing fan fiction. So don't bother to sue, I own nothing.**

* * *

Dad rushed into the kitchen from the back staircase. "Darcie, you n-n-need to go get the boys! Shit! Fuck! Ass!"

I spun around from making stew. "What's wrong da? Why do you need the boys?" I didn't even have to ask who he was talking about. Whenever he mentioned the boys it was always about Connor and Murph.

He grabbed my coat from the chair at the table shoving it into my arms. "Go girl." He took a card out of his pocket and folded it into my hand. "T-t-tell them the FBI was here."

I held up my hand. "Da! I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what happened. Are they okay?"

He collapsed into a chair pointing for me to sit. "You w-w-won't believe this. Fuck!"

* * *

I strode into the hallway seeing Connor and Murph playing red hands with a little boy. I let out a sigh I didn't even know I was holding. Murph saw me and slid off the little bed while Connor reached under it for a bag.

I gave them each a hug touching their faces and noticing their blood stained robes. I looked beneath the robes and noticed they were still in their boxers. That meant all this must have happened when they first woke up. "Jesus Christ, what happened?"

Connor looked down with a smile. "Don't take the lord's name in vain Darcie."

"What the…" I stopped noticing the nuns in the chairs next to us. My eyes widened and I let them drag me to the end of the hall out of ear shot. "What's going on?"

Murph looked at me. "Did anyone try coming back last night?"

I shook my head and wrapped my arms around his waist burning my face into his shoulder. "Please tell me you're okay. I don't want you two in danger. I don't want anyone going after you two."

Murph was rubbing my back whispering softly in my ear. It sounded like a song but I couldn't tell what it was. All I know was it was calming me down.

Connor gave a bitter laugh. "It's a bit late for that."

I looked up at both of them. "What do you mean?"

Murph shook his head, giving my forehead a light kiss. "Nothin' for you to worry about, yeah? We just needed a favor."

I nodded. "Anything."

Connor handed me the bag he had taken out before. "We just need you to hold this until we get out. Nothing big just hold onto it for us."

I took it and reached into my pocket handing him the card. "FBI came around and talked to da'." I relayed the information back to them and they nodded looking at each other.

Murph gave me a tight squeeze and released me. "We'll see you soon. Don't worry about us."

Connor nodded. "Just give Rocco a call will you? Tell him to stick around for a while; I think we're going to need him later."

I turned to them. "What are ya' going to do?"

Connor looked at the card. "Turn ourselves in, it was self defense."

I nodded. "That's what da' said the agent had said."

Murph looked at Connor over my head. "How the fuck's he know that? We haven't spoken to anyone yet."

Connor just shrugged. "Don't worry about it."

Murph let go of me directing me toward the doors. "Go ahead. We'll be fine."

I wrapped my arms around his neck giving him a solid kiss and turned away.

Murph gave a laugh. "Jesus, I should get hurt more often."

* * *

I was tapping my foot waiting for word from the boys. The word on the news last night said they weren't going to be charged with anything, but hadn't given word on their release. I told Rocco to get in touch with them, then threatened if he didn't call me and let me know what was going on.

He had called me to let me know they were staying over night but that was all he had said. That and they'd find me for the bag tomorrow.

The doorbell rang and I ran to answer it. Connor stood there with his hands in his pockets. I launched myself at him wrapping my arms around his waist. "You need to tell me what happened and why in the fucking hell you gave me a bag of guns and wallets."

Connor squeezed me laughing. "Mary mother of God, you are nosey."

Murph entered behind him lifting me into the air. "Well aren't we a little detective."

I tapped the paper on the kitchen table where Connor had sat down. "So how does it feel to be saints?"

Murph laughed looking at the paper. "I read it this morning. It's an interesting feeling. Lots of power." He winked. "I figure the all ladies'll find it attractive."

I crossed my arms. "Oh, I see how it is."

Connor laughed. "Nice job Murph. Let's see you get out of this one."

Murph took a second and winced. "That's not what I meant."

I shrugged and went to get the bag from my room.

Murph was at my side when I grabbed the bag. "Darcie, you know what I meant. I was just jokin' around. Come on."

I turned around smiling. "Christ, I know what you meant I just wanted a second alone with you." I frowned getting a better look at him and put a hand on his chest. "How bad are you hurt?"

He shook his head. "I'm fine. Connor's the only one really hurt. I promise." He pulled me into a kiss not letting me say anything else.

I maneuvered us onto my bed giving a small laugh as his eyes opened in surprise.

He brushed my hair out of my face kissing my eyelids. "You know what you look like right now?"

I traced his jaw feeling the muscles contract under my touch. "What's that?"

His lips found their way to my throat pressing into the most sensitive spots before looking back into my eyes. "An angel."

"Aye?" I said mocking his accent.

"Aye," he laughed.

Connor stood in the doorway. "Well if the Saint and Angel don't mind I think we need to get outta here."

Murph groaned giving me a kiss goodbye and slid off of me. "See ya later love."

I leaned up on my elbows looking at them suspiciously. "Where are you two going?" Connor and Murph looked at each other. "Oh damn it. I know that look." I stood up grabbing them both by the front of their shirts. They both looked taken aback for a second. "You're going after more Russians. Don't try to lie about it. There's no other reason you'd have taken their wallets, guns, and jewelry. Plus you're going to Patrick to get new guns and other toys." I noticed they both looked shocked but didn't bother trying to deny it. I released their shirts walking out the door. "Just please don't get yourselves killed."

They followed me into the kitchen. Connor just looked shocked. "You're okay with this?"

I rifled through the kitchen draw and came up with a roll of pennies throwing them to him. "They shouldn't try to muscle their way into Boston, this here is our territory." I nodded to the pennies. "Just do it right." I gave them each a kiss on the cheek. "Make me proud."

Murph paused at the door looking at me. "You know, every day I find out something more interesting about you."

I laughing turning back to the sauce I had started. "Just don't wear pantyhose over your head. It's just tacky."

* * *

"We have learned there were nine victims…"

I zoned out watching the television reporter. Nine. There had been nine. Connor and Murph had gone after nine Russians. One of which was undoubtedly the boss of the syndicate. I wrapped my arms around myself closing my eyes. No one had called me. What if they were two of the bodies in there?

The phone rang and I ran to grab it. "Hello?" If it was the morgue or Rocco telling me they were dead I was going to faint right here in the kitchen.

"'Ello love."

I gave a sigh of relief hearing Murph. He sounded drunk but very alive. "There were nine Murphy. Nine fuckin' bodies."

"I thought you were okay with this."

"You didn't tell me how many there were."

"I didn't know."

I paused and counted to ten in my mind. "Are you and Connor okay?"

"Aye, we're fine." His voice dropped a notch. "We're going to stay at Rocco's for the night. I'll call you tomorrow."

I gave a sigh. "All right, take care of yourselves. Don't get too piss drunk."

He gave a laugh on the other end. "Never promise that." He paused. "I love you Darcie."

"What?" But I was talking to the dial tone.

I hung the phone up and walked away. Goddamn drunk.

I saw Morgan my tabby cat lying in the window. "He had the fuckin' nerve to tell me he loves me." I closed my eyes. "I mean feck. I promised I'd stop swearing. Feck. Feck is good. Sounds close enough right?"

Morgan looked at me strangely and jumped out of the window strolling away.

I collapsed into the armchair near the window. "My fecking cat think's I'm crazy. Damn it all."

* * *

** A/N:**

**Maybe no one likes this. I know nothing will live up to Four Roses but I'm having fun with this. Well if you want me to continue let me know. My vacation pretty much starts tomorrow so I'll have more time to sit down and write. Mind you my story is first on my list but I'll crank out fanfiction if I get hte chance.**


	3. Romance Boston Syle

**Disclaimer: By now everyone should know no to sue. I ate Sour Patch Kids for dinner. Not a good thing.**

* * *

The door bell rang around noon the next day. I was still in pajamas as I went to the door and looked through the peephole. "Oh what the feck!" I opened the door and Murph, Connor and Rocco moved past me with duffle bags.

Rocco handed me a box of pastries as a peace offering. "How ya doin' Darcie?" Rocco was Italian and a package boy in the family. Around his friends he was known as Funny Man because even drunker than a skunk he could let out some of the best jokes.

I rubbed my forehead looking at the duffle bags. They had been hurriedly packed and I noticed a knife sticking out of Murph's. "Do I want to know?"

Connor gave a laugh. "Well Rocco killed Donna's cat last night. Today he offed a bunch of people at the Deli."

I raised an eyebrow. "So you recruited him for your crusade?"

Murph gave a sigh and leaned in to kiss me. "You know this whole premonition thing of yours is givin' me the creeps."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "I need to speak to you in private."

He rocked back on his heels smiling. "Really?"

I grabbed his hand and dragged him into the bathroom.

Murph looked me up and down, his eyes darkening. _Shit_. I had forgotten I was still in my pajamas. My version of pajamas was a cami and boxers. Not a good idea when it came to standing near Murph. He licked his lips looking at me.

I put a hand to the center of his chest. To stop him and myself for doing something before I could get my question answered. "Oh no. You need to explain yourself."

He gave me a questioning look and lifted me so I was sitting on the edge of the sink. "What did I do?" His hand was placed at my hip, rubbing a small bit of bare skin with his thumb.

I crossed my arms protectively over my chest. I noticed that only increased the appearance of cleavage and quickly moved them to my sides in turn moving his hands away. "This is about the phone call last night."

"Aye?"

"Explain yourself."

He was searching my face and it finally hit him what I was talking about. "Oh, you're mad about that?"

"More like pretty fucking confused."

He gave me a small smile. "Usually when someone says they love you its pretty self explanatory."

I felt my eyes widen and my heart skip a beat. "Wait you really meant it?"

Murph looked slightly hurt. "Well, yeah. I don't just say things without meaning them." His lips twitched back into a smile as if reading my mind. "You thought I was drunk didn't you."

I didn't meet his eyes. "Well you just never said it before…"

He lifted my chin giving me a kiss. "Let me give you a little fill in of information. The first time I killed, that day the Russians dragged us out of the apartment, all I could think of was Connor. He's my brother and my best friend; you don't fuckin' mess with the people I care about. I was scared shitless they were goin' to kill him. But last night?" He paused and released a breath. "I saw these nine guys in the room and all I could think was the night at the bar. I couldn't stop thinking that maybe they'd send more people to the bar. You know, as a payback for killin' two of their own. Sendin' people out to get your da' and you." His voice dropped a few octaves and stroked my hair. "All I could think was one of those fuckers were goin' after you. Doing somethin' bad that I wouldn't be able to stop. I couldn't stand it. I worry about you. I've cared for you a while now, even you had to have realized that. But after last night I realized how much I really did. So I'm keeping this up to protect you. I mean it's not just protectin' you. It's for everyone out there. It was just I saw your face and when the fat man was dead all I could think of was you were gonna be okay."

I leaned my face into his. "Damn it. Why do you say the right things? I'm probably going to regret this later but I love you too Murphy." I slid myself off the sink and into his arms pressing my lips into his.

He moved his lips from mine playing with the straps of my cami. His face took up a new position nuzzling my neck. "You know this isn't a very moral thing to do."

I looked at him through slitted eyes. One of his hands was running along the top of the cami too lightly. "Forget moral."

My fingers were tracing the muscles of his stomach under his shirt. Murphy's looks were knee shaking; his body could only be described as yummy. I'd been to the beach with him and Connor when we were a bit younger and I remembered getting caught staring at him. If he was yummy then he must be somewhere around delicious now.

He gave a low laugh and kissed the swell of my breasts straightening the cami's straps. "Well tonight isn't a good time to forget morality."

I gave a small sigh and made my way to the door.

My hand was on the knob when Murph turned me around and pressed me against the door. "You'd give up that easily?" His voice held a mixture of surprise and disappointment.

I wiggled in his grip trying to get comfortable. "No, I just know it's useless to fight with you. You're not one to do a one night stand or that shit."

He brushed my arms with his knuckles giving my shoulder a kiss. "Well, maybe this isn't a one night stand."

My toes curled but I gave myself a mental shake. No, way. He had done this to me before, getting me all excited and then turning all moral. It was my turn to make him realize I had just as much will power he did. Perhaps more. I turned form him and opened the door. "Let's go out there and let me hear exactly how you plan your hits." I looked at him rolling my eyes. "Only I could fall for a hit man."

* * *

I leaned against the doorframe watching Rocco and Connor load their bags into the car the next morning. After the incident at the bar da' had gone to Long Island for a week to visit his sister. I had pretty much forced him saying that he was not to worry and that I'd take care of the bar. I let the guys crash here for the night. Rocco took the guest room, Connor took the couch, and Murph had taken my da's room. I guess it was a bit mean to do. All he had to do was walk out his door and into mine and I'd be there. It was just something to show that I really did have more willpower and to test his. Of course I had locked the door in the event my willpower ran out and I went weak and tried going for a midnight walk to the next room.

Arms wrapped around my waist and Murph rested his chin on my shoulder. "What are ya' thinkin'?"

I tightened his grip on me. "I'm thinking something's not right." I turned to look at his face. "Murph, something doesn't feel right."

His lips twitched into a smile. "There a disturbance in the force?"

I squeezed his hands. "I'm being serious here. Something's not right and I'm worried." I turned in his arms and lightly touched the rosary around his neck. "Just humor me and call me, right?"

He nodded seriously this time and gave me a short kiss. "We'll be back later. I'll call you, I promise."

I watched him from the window as he hopped in the car and drove away. I walked back into the kitchen waiting for something to appear I could occupy myself with. My cousin Patrick, the same who had traded the boys what they had for all their new toys, was manning the bar downstairs for me. He was more useful tending the bar than I was right about now. I'd clean everything up later but having time to myself was worth it. Well it would be if I knew what to do with myself.

* * *

I walked down the stairs and sat on the front steps where my best friend Molly was already waiting. We'd known each other for our whole lives and had our own version of friendship and sisterhood.

She took one look at me and laughed. "So how are our Saints doing?"

I sighed looking at the ground by my feet. "They're fine, spent the night here. Probably spend it again tonight."

She looked at me as if she understood. "They offed the syndicate at the hotel."

I sighed nodding.

She smiled. "Good for them. We need to get rid of everyone trying to hustle their way in. If you want to get into Boston you better be a Mick or a wop. No fuckin' Russian will ever make their piece here. We've been established for too long."

I hugged myself. "Yeah, yeah, good for them as long as they don't get themselves killed." I turned my face to Molly. "Murphy told me he loves me."

Her eyes widened. "He finally said it? Congratulations. Christ, everyone's been waiting for it. I mean no offense but it's pretty obvious that's where your sights were." She gave a small smile. "I wonder what would have happened if Murph ever found out you had a boyfriend. This is just hypothetical relax. Technically you didn't have an agreement not to see other people and you weren't in a relationship. Wonder what he would have done."

I shrugged. "Beat the shit out of him in the back ally. That's what he did to Joshua Hennessey. Josh was hitting on me and grabbed me ass one night. I hauled around and smacked him and before I knew it Josh was gone. Murph came back into the bar with a bit of blood on his knuckles and I never had a problem from Josh after that night."

Molly looked at me in shock. "Did you confront him about it?"

I smiled. "I took him to the back room and poured some peroxide on his knuckles. It wasn't just his blood; he'd scraped off a layer after beating the shit outta Josh. Then I reminded him I was a big girl and I could handle myself. To which he responded, 'You shouldn't have to handle yourself. He needed to learn some fuckin' manners on how to act toward a lady.'" I laughed. "This coming from the one who still periodically sneaks me to the storage closet, to make out like as if we're a pair of horny teenagers."

Molly gave me a hug. "Well at least you look happy."

I gave her a sad smile. "I'm happy about him but what about the killings?"

She gave me a look like I was crazy. "What about them? They're doing the community a favor by getting rid of them. These guys have no morals. At least with the mob and mafia if you get hit you had it coming. With these guys they'll hit you just because they don't like your fucking tie. It's the principle of it all. Plus come on. Everyone we know and grew up with is on one of the family businesses. What's the big deal? We eat, shake hands, and go to church with a bunch of killers. It's fucking Boston."

I nodded me head. She was right. What was I expecting, something romantic like in the movies? This was fucking Boston. It _was_ romantic if someone killed for you.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Not much to say. I love my friends. Yay for Yule/Christmas presents. Including an inflatable stress bat.**

**Thanks to:**

**renee vampyre655**

**Reid's Girl  
penscratch**


	4. A Revelation

**Disclaimer: I don't bathe in diamonds. Don't sue. I'm the poorest of all my friends. Yet they still owe me money…go figure.**

**Although when my friend gets access to her money I've told her she must give a few thousand to research to create a midget moose. Yes I want a pet moose, preferable pocket sized.**

* * *

"Put the iron on."

"What?" My heart was racing because I heard Rocco screaming and Connor swearing in the background. "Murphy! What's going on?"

"Damn it put the iron on and get out your first aid. We're coming around the corner now."

I flew around the kitchen setting the iron up and grabbing every medical item I could find in the bathroom. The door banged open and I watched Murphy, Connor and Rocco barge in covered in blood. My hand briefly went to my mouth but in a second I was in my zone. I grabbed wash cloths and told them to wipe up their faces so I could see what I had to do. I needed to see where the real injuries were. That and I was praying the majority of the blood they were sporting wasn't theirs.

I saw Murphy's arm bleeding and realized why he had told me to put on the iron. I shook my head violently. "I'll take you to the clinic, they won't say anything. I'll give you stitches but don't do this."

He grabbed a dish towel and nodded to his brother. Rocco moved Murph onto the table pressing his arms behind his back. Connor grabbed the iron and looked at me expectantly. I swore under my breath and knelt down rolling the dish towel and placing it in his mouth to bite down on. I held onto his shoulders quickly whipping the gunshot wound with peroxide. I pressed my forehead against his forcing his eyes to look into mine as the iron found his skin.

The next half hour went by in slow motion. Murphy's face had been hardest for me to face, which could have been because I was eye level with him or because I really did love him. This whole thing was defiantly now scaring the shit out of me. Rocco had lost a finger and they had pressed the iron against his stump after I had gotten at it with peroxide. I had made sure that as long as they were doing something as stupid as using the iron they would at least have had the peroxide as a small precaution. Connor had been shot in the leg and we had forced him into a chair. The pants had to be ripped so as not to iron his pants into the wound. I had just set Rocco's bandages as he picked up the iron. Murph linked his arms under his brother's making sure Connor would not be able to fight back. I watched helplessly knowing there was nothing more I could do. I thought the dishtowel would tear apart when we were finally done.

The three of them had turned on the news while I did last minute bandaging. Murph had placed me on his lap holding me tightly but never taking his eyes off the TV. It was as if he was holding on to me making sure this wasn't all a dream. I closed my eyes and lay my head on his shoulder. I was shaking for him. I was shaking for all of them. They had finally told me what had happened and it scared me out of my mind. It was supposed to be an easy hit; one, two, three. Well it was until they got outside. One man with six guns had done this. An old fucking guy on top of it all.

"Fuckin' hell." Connor swore as he saw the man on the TV.

Rocco looked up. "What? That guy?"

Murph nodded. "That's the guy that got us off the hook with the Chekov thing."

Connor crushed his cigarette into the ashtray I left out. "Well, this guy is very sharp. If he hasn't figured us out yet, he will." His voice lowered. "You bet your ass he will."

Rocco waved a hand at the TV. "Well than that makes him a lia-fucking-bility."

Connor shook his head. "He isn't to be touched."

Murph nodded in agreement. "He's a good man."

Rocco stood up. "Fine, whatever. I'm going to fucking bed. I lost my fucking finger. I found out the family has a fucking hit on me and I'm fucked. I've had a fucking long day." He nodded and went off to the spare room.

Connor stretched and shut off the TV and turned to us. "Go get sleep. We've got mass in the morning. We'll figure everything out there."

He ruffled my hair and punched his brother in the arm wincing when he realized what arm he hit. "Sorry Murph."

I slid off Murph's lap and he made a motion to grab me. "I'll be right back. I just want to get changed." My eyes dropped to his. "Meet me in my room; I want to talk to you."

He nodded and I felt his eyes follow me as I walked off.

I pushed the door and stripped off my clothes sighing as I noticed the blood on them. I'd fix it tomorrow; right now I couldn't care less. I slid a small, light, black nightgown over my head smoothing it down. I took my hair out of the pony tail I had held it up in and let my hair fall around my shoulders. For once I looked relaxed.

I heard a knock on the door and opened it letting Murph enter. He was bare chested and his arm was wrapped in white gauze. I thought I had done a pretty good job but was still worried. I would probably have to change the dressings on all three of them very first thing in the morning.

Murph only had on a pair of boxers and looked apologetic. "I needed to take that shirt off and it hurt too damn much to get a new one on." He lay back on my bed rubbing his forehead as if trying to banish something from his mind.

I slid next to him sitting up and laying a hand on top of his. "You want to talk?"

He moved his eyes to my face lacing our fingers together. "Not really. I just want to be with you right now." He pulled me closer to him as if protecting me while protecting himself. He let out a sigh looking down at me with a small smile. "You really do look like an angel."

I shook my head. "I'm in black, doesn't make me a very good angel now does it?" My fingers were roaming his chest feeling the warmth radiate off of him.

His hand moved to the bottom of the nightgown which was at mid thigh. He slid it up slightly tracing his fingers lightly over my skin. "It's okay to be slightly tainted." He kissed me in a passionate but comforting way. He slowly broke the kiss opening his eyes slower than I did. He looked down at me with a curious look I didn't recognize. "I did a lot of thinking today."

I tilted my head to the side signaling him to continue. I had done a lot of thinking too, but it was better if he went first.

He turned onto his side more so we were nearly eye level. "Today in the middle of the shooting. I think I finally realized how dangerous this all is. At first it was self defense. Then it was a matter of principle. Today were two hits for Rocco. The second nearly got us all killed. It made me realize a few things."

I moved closer to him wanting to feel the beat of his heart next to mine. "What things?"

His hand caressed my face while the thumb of his other hand lightly brushed my thigh. "It put everything in perspective. I mean this is very important to me. The lawful ways of justice don't always take you very far; sometimes you have to take it into your own hands. More importantly I know how dangerous this is and I don't want to die with any kind of regret loomin' over me. That was what I though about when I fell into the front bushes. I didn't want to die with these regrets."

My voice was low and I tried controlling the slight shake in it. My heart was pounding so furiously I could feel it in my throat. "What would you have regretted?"

His hand slid up higher under my nightgown while the other moved behind my back sliding me beneath him. "I would have regretted never being with you. Never showing you how I truly love you." His voice lowered to a horse whisper. "Never making love to you."

I felt my breath catch in my throat. I stared into his eyes feeling the true sincerity in them. One arm snaked around his neck while the other guided his hand higher up the nightgown sending sparks of pleasure through me. My voice was almost a whisper once I found the strength to speak. "I would regret that as much as you would. You should never live your life with any kind of regret, especially when it comes to this."

He turned and grabbed my comforter from the foot of my bed and draped it over us as he worked on lifting my nightgown all the way off. "Than let's not have any regrets."

* * *

I stared up at him feeling a blush spread over my body. His eyes were carefully roaming over every inch of me beneath him. His eyes found their way back to mine and held fast. "No regrets?"

I slowly shook my head pushing his boxers off his hips. "No regrets." My eyes widened when his boxers were fully off.

He smirked at my expression. "See something you like?"

I pulled at his neck making him over inches over me without hurting his arm. "I always have." I flicked my tongue out to trace his bottom lip and felt butterflies in my stomach. I had never been _this_ forward with him. But I didn't want to let him get away. Not this time.

Those hypnotizing eyes darkened. It wasn't a color change, no. His eyes were always a bright blue with light green tones. No, when his eyes darkened the laugher of light was replaced with hatred or immense lust. Seeing as I wasn't cowering in a corner I was going with lust. Of course even with lust I probably should have run away. But I've never been too bright.

He crashed his mouth against mine urging my lips apart with his tongue. I hurriedly let him in. My hands were raking up and down his chest feeling the pure heat radiating off of him.

He changed his position to leaning on his elbows to relieve the pressure form his arms. One of his hands reached down and traced a path from my navel down. He teased me with a finger before inserting it into me. I gave a little gasp against his lips. He took it as encouragement and inserted a second finger making little motions within me. My hips involuntary moved up with his touch. I drew my lips form his to get air and let out a low moan. "Murphy." My eyes were pleading. Murphy was a tease above all else and knew it drove me insane.

He smiled and drew out his fingers. He repositioned himself locking eyes with me and pressed his body against mine. With a quick flick of his eyes he entered me and my back immediately arched. He started slow and steadily moved faster, both of us finding a steady rhythm.

My hands were at his back pressing my nails into him. He was supporting himself with one arm while the other was gently massaged my breasts. I brought his mouth to mine wanting to taste him. His tongue probed in my mouth as if searching for my essence. A moan escaped from the back of his throat and I knew it wouldn't be long for either of us.

I broke the kiss my head falling as my back made one last arch. We released at nearly the same time.

Murphy collapsed next to me, his breath ragged. He moved a few strands of hair from my face giving me light little kisses. "I only regret one thin'," he said smiling.

I let him pull me against him closing my eyes and laying my head under his chin. "Mmm? What's that?"

He planted a kiss at the top of my head his voice growing soft and light. "I regret not doin' this sooner."

* * *

I woke up slowly to kisses on my neck. I gave a satisfied noise and lifted Murphy's face to mine. "I think I could get used to his wake up call." I brushed my lips across his and kissed the top of his jaw.

He moved a hand to my face tracing my bottom lip with his thumb. "Aye." He chuckled moving closer to me. "But fuck Darcie, you sure know how to tire a guy out."

I gave him my best innocent expression. "I don't know what you're talking about." I traced my fingers down his chest teasingly just brushing the spot below his navel. I felt him still stiff against my leg and smirked. "Tired out my ass."

He smiled and buried his face in the crook of my neck. "An' what an ass it is." I gave a gasp as he bit gently on my neck. As if the gasp was encouragement he bit harder. My neck had always been a weak spot but after last night he had finally found the exact location of the weakest areas. He moved on top of me an impish grin on his face. "Shall we have another go?"

"Oh fuck. Please tell me you two are wearin' clothes at least."

I looked over Murph's shoulder to see Connor in the doorway. "Don't you believe in knockin'?"

Murph slid to the side. "Mornin' Connor. If ya don't mind I'm gonna tell ya to get the fuck outta this room right now."

Connor pinched the bridge of his nose. "At least I didn't catch ya in the act." He picked the boxers and night gown off the floor and promptly dropped them. "Just get some clothes on, we needa get ta' mass." With a grunt he walked out of the door muttering something under his breath.

I squinted at him. "What the feck did he just say?"

Murph was trying not to grin. "He said lucky bastard and something about finding a commandment we didn't break this week."

Murphy slid to the side of the bed and I let out a whimper. He turned around with a smirk. "You want me bad."

I made a pouty face and nodded letting the sheet slid off of me revealing all that was underneath.

I watched as Murphy's eyes trailed my body and he visibly swallowed. "Thas not funny."

I reached for his hand and drew his index finger into my mouth tenderly massaging it with my tongue. His eyes closed and his breath slowed. I watched with satisfaction as he grew in his lap. How he had entered me at all was still a mystery.

He very slowly removed his finger looking at me dangerously. "Thas defiantly not funny, Darcie."

He paused for a moment then stood grabbing a fresh pair of boxers from his bag in the corner, and pulled them on. I sighed and followed him out of bed walking over to my dresser. Damn his willpower. I hadn't done that in a long time and it had never been that good.

I pulled on a pair of binki-strap panties and felt a hand on my hip. I turned giving Murphy a stern look. "Oh no, none of that, you had your chance."

He gave a smile and traced the tattoo on my hipbone. "How come I never saw it before?"

I looked down at his fingers. Beneath the fingers was a tattoo of a pale rose beneath the word 'Requiem'. I slid a bra over my shoulders. "I just guess you never looked hard enough." I shimmied into a light black skirt and a tight emerald sweater. I shoved Murph to the next room so he could put clothes on and walked into the kitchen.

Connor and Rocco were both sitting at the table drinking coffee when I walked in.

Rocco's eyes were extremely blurry and he looked as if he'd never gotten up this early before. "Mornin'." He stopped getting a closer look at me and his eyes widened. "Shit! You and Murph?"

I rolled my eyes and walked to find a glass of orange juice. I poured a tall glass full and chugged it down. "We ready to go?"

Rocco nodded and headed out the door to grab the car. Connor looked at me expectedly. "Well?"

I crossed my arms. "Well what?"

He gave a huff. "Darcie, I've known ya since we were sixteen. What the hell happened? Everyone knows about you two messin' around on occasion but it's never gotten to this."

I felt a blush creep up my cheeks but stood my ground. "So what?" I sighed realizing how harsh I sounded. "Sorry Connor. It's just; damn you know how I've felt about him." I dropped my head. "You were the first one I told."

He gave a grunt. "Yeah and at first I thought you were in love with me."

I brought my eyes up feeling a slight pang of guilt. "I did like you Con, it's just we don't fit like that. We're not like that."

He shook his head. "He's a lucky bastard." He gave my shoulder a squeeze and kissed my forehead. "Just make sure you know what you're doin' and don't break his heart."

Murph walked in behind me shrugging into his jacket. "Let's go."

He hurried past Connor and me without a word. Connor watched him walk away and silently swore. "I think he heard us."

I raised an eyebrow. "We didn't say anything bad."

Connor ushered me out the door and took the keys from my hand locking up. "I think he heard a bit. Like how you told me. See, I never told him."

I struggled to comprehend what he was trying to say. "And? That just means you're a good friend, and you knew it would be awkward."

He slid past me down the stairs. "Actually it wouldn't have been. He told me he loved you and wanted to know what I knew. I lied and said you were in love with me."

* * *

**A/N:**

**Well this was long…**

**Any who enjoying my vacation, hope you are all having fun celebrating whatever holiday you observe.**

**Also thank you to:**

** Misty Days-This should tide you over for a bit :)**

**and**

**penscratch-i love my reviewers, no matter if they flame or not. you guys keep me going.**


	5. Redemption

**Disclaimer: I am a poor village girl in love with a strong handsome milk boy. Oh whatever shall I do?**

**I'm tired. I've been making more bloody cookies than most bakeries. **

**And 10pm trips for christmas presents kills.**

**Don't sue.**

* * *

The car pulled up to the church and Rocco made a joke to Murphy about getting rid of this early morning church shit, but I didn't hear his response. I was more focused on his face which was unreadable. He hadn't said anything in the car. I had sat shotgun and turned to say something but Connor had just told Rocco to drive and that had been that.

I reached out and touched Murphy's arm but he just drew it out of my grasp. Connor walked silently next to him. They didn't look at each other or at me. Fine then.

I bowed my head and pushed in between them. "Fuck the both of you then." I moved forward letting them close the gap and stalked through the church doors. Genuflecting I took my place a few pews from the back.

I watched as the twins moved up the aisle, genuflecting before sliding into their pew. They simultaneously took their rosaries from around their necks and began to silently pray. Never once had they made eye contact with each other.

I drew a small silver rosary from my pocket and held it between my hands. I don't know what I was thinking. There was no possible way I could focus on praying when everything was falling apart like this.

My fingers shook as I thought back to everything that had happened.

The brothers had come to Boston when they were sixteen on their mother's orders. She had decided not to come and to continue her life in Ireland. However she wanted her boys to have an American education and sent them to live with relatives over here. They were enrolled in a private catholic school. The school had been all boys before combining with its sister school to lower the tuition and make it easier for families to make one commute to bring their children to school. I had been enrolled in the all girls' school and had mixed feelings about being combined but my feelings vanished when I met the McManus brothers.

_It was the summer before our junior year of high school when I came home to my father entertaining one of his friends. Mr. Finnegan smiled as I walked in and introduced me to his cousins who would be going to school with me in the fall._

_My father had ushered us out of the flat telling me to show the boys around the neighborhood. In truth he had Finnegan had business to discuss and they didn't want us around. Most likely bookie business or something borderline illegal but it didn't faze me. My father knew how to take care of himself._

_We were walking through the park when I started getting nervous. They hadn't said a word to me all day. I pointed out buildings and they just nodded, that had been it. Both had intense blue eyes with little undertones of green. Connor's hair was a lighter brown and was tossed around almost spiky while Murphy's was dark brown and was not so much windswept. They moved simultaneously and were making me nervous. _

_I finally turned to face them. "Do you two ever talk? Because you're making me pretty fuckin' nervous."_

_They looked at each other and burst out laughing. It was a nice sound but at the time it just irritated me. "Fine just fuckin' laugh at me. Find your own way back you tossers."_

_I didn't get farther than a few feet before they stopped me. They were both grinning. It was Connor that spoke first. "Oi, don't be getting' upset over that."_

_Murphy nodded. "We were only foolin' love. It was jus we're always told we never shut up. Ma pretty much threatened us ta be on our best behavior and not to speak too much or else people will get nervous."_

_Their brogues were thicker than most people's I knew. Than again most people I knew had been living here for over ten years and although they still had brogue they didn't remain as fresh as the ones these two had. _

_I smiled. "Apology accepted. Never worry about speaking too much in front of me. I like listening. The sound of my own voice makes me paranoid."_

"_The sound of your voice makes me horny."_

_I turned on my heel to see Sean Deagan smiling at me. "Fuck off Deagan."_

_He moved closer to me ignoring the twins behind me. "How about you fuck me and we'll call it even beautiful?"_

_I punched him in the nose hearing the sound of a crack and blood pour from his nose. I hooked a foot behind his leg and tripped him into the sidewalk. I lifted my foot above his crotch letting it hover. "Going to apologize asshole?"_

_He nodded clutching his nose. "I'm sorry. I promise I'll never bother you again." I don't know if he said it so much as he was actually sorry or that I was about to crush the family jewels._

"_Good boy." It didn't matter he had apologize. I slammed my foot into his hearing him let out a scream and curl into a fetal position._

_I turned back to the brothers. "Sorry about that."_

_They looked at me wide eyed. It was Connor who spoke first. "I don't think I ever want to piss you off."_

_Murphy nodded and looked puzzled. "This usually happen?"_

_I shrugged. "Sometimes. Usually after one of them takes a swig of whisky or something they think they're big and brave until I knock them down. Around here you pretty much have to fend for yourself, because no one else is gonna watch out for you."_

_Connor and Murphy looked at each other and nodded. They each slid an arm through mind in escort fashion. _

_Connor smiled at me. "Meet your new guardians. We always loved fighting."_

"_Aye," Murphy nodded. "And this isn't one of those things we can get in trouble for. No one should advance a lassie like that. We'll just teach some of these American boys some manners._

_I gave their arms a squeeze and led the way home. "So you two are my guardian angels?"_

_Connor shook his head. "Not angels. We're not perfect."_

_Murphy screwed up his face in concentration. "More like saints. We start out corrupt but in the end we change for the better. What we do is actually for the better of the people."_

_I laughed. "Saint Connor and Saint Murphy, patron saints of honor and the girls of Boston."_

That was how we became friends. Over the year we had grown closer and closer. It was true they had their guy friends, especially Rocco. But when it came down to the core everyone knew not to mess with the three of us. If a guy wanted to ask me out, they had to make sure Connor and Murphy approved. If something happened to me on a date there would be hell to pay the next day, sometimes even that same night. As for the boys I always had my eyes out for them and made sure they never went too far in their fights and was always there when they needed a favor.

The more I spent time with them the more I realized my feelings for them were growing more than just as friendship. I started out with a crush on Connor but realized we wouldn't work out as more than friends. Connor was more of a big brother than boyfriend material. My eyes had moved to Murphy. Murphy and I were more alike than myself and Connor. We thought on the same level and our teasing held flirting moments. I think the reason I didn't look to Murphy first was because of the floods of girls that were after him. It was true Connor had floods but for some reason it just seemed more flocked toward Murphy.

One day I finally broke down and told Connor everything. He sat in silence and nodded when I made me promise not to tell Murphy. Connor had come out and told me that he had been holding out for me falling for him. _That _had been an awkward conversation.

It had been the more time I spent with Murphy the more I realized how much I cared about him. I had always kissed the boys as way of greeting but one night as they were leaving my kiss lingered a big longer with Murphy. He had given me a questioning look but I just covered the moment with a laugh telling him he should hurry home.

That was the summer before our senior year of high school. One night Murphy had come over to watch movies. Connor had gone out on a double date with Rocco and the two of us really didn't have anything better to do. The three of us usually hung out on the weekends when one of us didn't have something to do already. Sometimes Rocco would be with us, unless he was working family detail. I had been upset that night because of something I had found out. I had been talking to a boy named Heath for a week when he asked me out. I declined saying that we hardly knew each other and I needed time. He was going to be a sophomore in college not to far away from where I lived but still, I hardly knew him and wasn't going to date someone I knew hardly anything about. Well my friend Monica had known him and let me in on a few of his secrets. First of all he was bisexual, which truthfully didn't bother me. I didn't care about something like that, you can't change who your are or what sex you lean toward. As long as he didn't cheat on me with another guy I was fine. However something else about him I couldn't take. As if turned out he had had sex with a dog, on more than one occasion. What was worse was that the dog was male and most of the time Heath was on the receiving end. That was too much for me to handle. What had upset me was that I thought I had finally found someone to take my mind off Murphy. Heath was sweet and everything but the bestiality wasn't something I could deal with. That was just one of my bad experiences with guys. My first boyfriend had had a girlfriend who was four years younger than him. He had been eighteen and I was sixteen. The fact his girlfriend was fourteen freaked me out and led me to call him pedophile boy after than. I had dated a pyro and that ended because he got arrested for setting fire to a gazebo. He had written out our names in gasoline and set fire to it. Romantic? Possibly but it was getting to be a bit of an obsessive relationship. But as for Heath I didn't dare telling Murphy. He was a good friend and all but I would never hear the end of it. Ever.

Looking back on it now I think I could see if from Murphy's point of view. I was noticeably upset. He must have taken it as I was upset Connor was dating someone that wasn't me. Damn Connor, why had he lied to Murphy?

I was leaning against Murphy during the movie. At some point he had out his arm around me and was running his thumb across the shin on my arm. I looked up at him realizing I had been wasting my time trying to get him out of my mind. I spent too much time with him not to feel something. And I didn't want to just cut him out of my life. He saw me looking down at him and gave me a light kiss. I had gasped and that had earned me a smile and another kiss. We were making out on the couch when we finally heard the end credits of the movie.

After that night our friendship had never been the same. We were still close but there was a new feeling. It was true we dated other people but it was never more than a brief relationship. I was more focus on my grades while Murphy was focused on what he was going to do with himself. Strange but we never dated. I think we were both partly afraid of what would happen if we did.

That relationship we had started lasted to now. Of course now somehow everything had gotten fucked up and I was back to square one.

I felt a tear run down my cheek and silently swore. I was not going to cry over this. Before I could reach my hand up I felt a thumb press against my cheek wiping the tear away. I glanced up and saw Murphy staring down at me.

I looked back down at the floor. "I'm not talking to you here." I kept my voice a respectful low even though there was no one else in the church. Truthfully that was a lie. Someone could be walking in with a gun and I would be oblivious.

Murphy slid next to me in the pew. "Seems like this is the best place for forgiveness."

"I don't know what there is to forgive. Last night was a mistake. It happens." My heart was breaking in my chest as I got those words out of my mouth. I had made up my mind. It was better to lie than anything else. I kept my head bowed, not trusting myself to look back at him.

"Darcie, you don't really believe that." Murphy's voice sounded hurt and I saw his hand grab for mine.

I moved my hand out of his reach. "Maybe I do. What does it matter?" I looked up into his face and felt my heart drop as I saw the mixture of hurt and anger in his eyes. I didn't want to see him hurt. I had beat up girls in bathrooms in high school for even saying something nasty about Murphy or Connor. It was killing me to know this time; I was the one that put that look on his face. "Somehow I messed up. I don't know how I did it, but you've never walked away from me without and explanation like that. I'm not coming between you and Connor. Because I know in the end which of us you'd pick." I noticed him open his mouth and cut him off. "Don't you dare lie to me Murphy. I know it's true. I accepted that a long time ago. I'll stay your friend, you still have my place as a safe house, but I think that's it Murphy."

His jaw was set. "Do you really mean that?"

I nodded, not daring to open my mouth. There was a stinging in my chest I couldn't ignore, this was too much for me.

He cradled the side of my face with one hand. "Then why are you cryin'?"

I moved my hand to my cheeks and sure enough there were tears flowing from my eyes. I hadn't even felt them. I whipped my eyes with the palm of my hands and ran my fingers through my hair trying to think.

Murphy laced our fingers together, making my heart skip. I don't know why I just always believed lacing fingers was one of the most intimate things on the world. "Darcie, I'm sorry about before. I know I shouldn't have walked out; it's just there was a hundred thin's runnin' through my mind. I was realizin' how amazin' it was with you. How long I've been waitin' to tell you how I felt. Then I got worried because well maybe what Connor said those years ago was right. Maybe you loved him first and I was just a side thought. Maybe I was just the runner up because you couldn't get first prize. Then I heard you tellin' Con that you did like him. What was I suppose to think Darcie?"

I placed my face in my hands, leaning my elbows against the front of the pew. "I wouldn't have expected you to come to a conclusion when you didn't hear the whole conversation. Murphy, I had a crush on both of you when I was younger, damn. I mean I was around both of you all the time and the more time I spent with you two the more I realized I liked you as more than just friends. But with Con he was just more of a big brother. It may have started as somethin' different but in the end he was just like an older brother. With you it just turned out differently. That first night when this whole thing started, with just the two of us, obviously wasn't what you thought. That date Con was on? I helped him set it up. I was upset because I found out somethin' about some kid that had asked me out. I was pissed off because I thought I was finally goin' to get you off my mind. I didn't want to ruin our friendship with that. But the longer I sat with you, the more I realized it would never work. I'm not meant to ignore you or forget you. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do."

Murphy looked at me in surprise. "Why didn't you just tell me how you felt?"

I let a small smile come to my face. "Why didn't you?"

He gave a sigh. "I was too scared of loosin' you. I wasn't comin' between you and my brother." He looked at me sadly. "I didn't want to lose you just because of how I felt."

I felt another tear run down my cheek. _Damn it, what was with all this ridiculous crying?_ "Now you know what I was going through."

He kissed my cheek lightly, stood up and stopped. "There was something you wanted to tell me the other night."

I looked at him remembering. "Oh, it's not important."

He sat back down. "Can you tell me anyway?"

I sighed. "I just wanted to talk to you. Murphy, I really do love you. I wanted to apologize for not telling you the truth sooner. I got a college degree, I could have done a hundred other things but I was too damn scared. I wanted to stay close to home. I mean I had to for da. But more importantly I wanted to stay for you and Connor. You two mean the world to me. I just wanted to let you know I'll do anything I can for you." I looked into his eyes. "If you need to get out of Boston, I'm coming with you."

He shook his head. "Darcie, you're not changin' your life to follow a pair of convicts. You're an innocent."

"Innocent girls don't fall in love with convicts. I'm not getting any younger, Murphy. Da's not keeping the bar anyway, where am I gonna go?"

Murphy looked confused. "What do you mean he's not keepin' the bar?"

I lowered my head. "He was pissed at first when the Russian's took over but then he thought about it. My Aunt Megan, the one he's visiting, she's been looking to go back to Ireland. Asked da to go with her. He husband passed away last year and the two of them have been talkin' more and more about going back. That leaves me jobless. I'm not looking to be a bartender for the rest of my life." I lifted my eyes back to his. "I want to be with you. I'm not lookin' to break up you and Con, I would never do that and I know not to try. But I won't just walk away."

Murphy stood and I noticed Connor walking out of the confessional tucking away his gun. A few moments later Rocco did the same, only coming from the middle. Murphy took my hand lifting me beside him. He took my other hand in his; bring both my hands to his lips kissing them lightly. "I wouldn't let you walk away without a fight. But we still need to talk about this."

Rocco moved over to us putting his arms over our shoulders. "God works in mysterious ways."

Connor smacked him upside the head.

"Uh what does that mean?" I looked at them in confusion.

Connor and Rocco shook their heads with smiles on their faces.

I shrugged walking out of the church. "I have to make breakfast in order for you to tell me don't I?"

Rocco ran ahead of me opening the door to the car. "It's good havin' you around Darcie. You almost domesticate us."

I lifted my eyebrows at the three of them. "The only way to domesticate an animal is to de-claw and neuter them." I smiled looking at them. "So you going to let me take your guns and castrate you?"

Murphy gave me a kiss and slid into the back seat. "Sometimes I wonder how you stayed around us bein' so damn sweet. Then you open that beautiful little mouth of yours."

* * *

**A/N:**

**Aye, someone just gave herself and early present of the unrated special edition of The Boondock Saints.**

**It comes with the full script. Oh la la how easy my job is now.**

**Thanks to my reviewers:**

**Penscratch: I hope this was the good kind of different for you.**

**Misty Days: Thanks for the confidence, glad to know you're enjoying it.**


	6. Relaxation Interrupted

**Disclaimer: I own very little. I'm a pathetic person. You know that bit in the last chapter about Darcie's ex-boyfriends? Yeah those are all true. Well, minus the gazebo kid. Although my friends have bets going that will be the nest I date.**

**Suing me would be cruel.**

* * *

I watched as Murphy, Connor and Rocco scarfed down the last of their food. "So what you're telling me is that this Agent Smecker is on your side?"

Rocco nodded, egg falling from his mouth as he started to talk. "Yeah, a hundred percent."

Connor laughed. "Yeah, well more me and Murph. He thinks Roc's nothin' more than a stupid WOP."

I snorted. "Well, if the shoe fits…"

Rocco flipped me the bird. "You know, you used to be a sweet kid." He glanced me up and down. "Annoying and Irish, but a nice ass." Connor and Murphy both smacked him upside the head. Rocco rubbed his head. "I was only telling the truth. Don't get your fuckin' panties in a twist."

Connor gave Rocco a look. "Man, you were out of school before she was even a freshman."

Rocco just shrugged. "Didn't stop me looking."

I waved a spatula in the air. "Hullo! I'm still here."

Murphy looked me over then turned back to Rocco with a smile. "When Connor and I first met her she was taking us around. She was walking ahead of us the whole time and I'd have to agree she had a nice ass then and still has one now."

I threw the spatula at him with a sigh. "You know, it's really no wonder any of you can hold a relationship."

Connor looked at me expectantly. "Well what about you and Murph?"

I crossed my arms. "Explain."

Connor didn't repeat himself, but turned to his brother.

Murphy stared back at him. "You know."

Connor nodded and went back to his food.

Rocco and I looked at each other. I shrugged. They were twins. They didn't have to verbally explain themselves. They just knew. It just annoyed me that I wasn't part of the discussion, when I was obviously invovled.

They were discussing what they were going to tell Smecker when I saw Murphy look at me with a smile. I shook my head but he just kept smiling.

I walked out of the kitchen throwing a dishtowel at his face. "The three of you need to figure out what you're doing. Call this guy from my house. I need to take a shower and I swear to god, if you aren't here when I get out I will hunt the three of you down."

I stepped into the shower letting the steam roll over me. I gave a long awaited sigh and stretched my arms out. I heard the door open and froze. I heard a laugh from the other side and poked my head out of the curtain. "Christ Murphy, can't I have five seconds of peace?"

He shrugged. "There's only one bathroom."

I pointed out the door. "Go down to the bar then."

He was pulling his shirt over his head. "Yeah, but there isn't a shower down there."

"Oh, no you don't. You can wait your turn just like the other two."

He kicked off his jeans giving me an innocent look. "But if we shower together we'll save time."

I drew the shower curtain shut. "Go away Murphy. I still haven't forgiven you, yet."

"Than let me take the opportunity to make up for myself." He had come in through the other side of the curtain and was now behind me grinning.

The pounding of my heart must have stopped me from hearing him. I put a hand on his chest. "Murphy."

He moved his arm around me grabbing the soap. "Have I done anythin'?"

I turned rinsing the conditioner from my hair then paused.

"_Is thíos i Gort na Saileán  
sea casadh dom mo rún_."

It took me a second to realize it was Murphy singing. His voice was soft and light and I found myself staring at him as he sang.

"_Ba luath a cos ar féar ann  
is ba luaineach a leagan siúil  
Sé dúirt sí liom bheith suaimhneach  
mar a fhásann duilliúr is bláth  
Ach bhí mise óg is uaibhreach  
is níor éist mé le guth mo ghrá."_

He looked at me beneath his lashes holding out a hand to me. I moved forward letting him pull me in to his chest. He kissed me and moved us both under the spray of the shower head. His hands moved their way up my back and into my hair, massaging my scalp. Moving his lips from mine he began gently biting the skin of my neck. He continued to beautifully sing the words of the song while slowly moving his hands from my hair and raising me up the wall.

"_Is thíos cois abhann go déaneamh  
sea sheas mé le mo ghrá  
Gualainn ar ghualainn le chéile  
is leag sí orm lámh."_

He had moved me up the wall and tenderly entered me. I gave a light cry, earning me a kiss. He kept his eyes on mine, not allowing me to shut my own and breathed out the rest of the song.

"_Sé dúirt sí liom bheith suaimhneach  
mar a fhásann féar aníos  
Ach bhí mise óg is uabhreach  
'stá na deoira anois mo chloí."_

I pressed my hands to his shoulders, repositioning myself. I watched as his eyes widen when I wrapped my legs tighter around his waist. He gave a sharp intake a breath making me smile. I have one upped him this time.

The bathroom door banged open and I could hear the zipper of pants and a pause. I put a hand over Murphy's mouth to stop what I'm sure would have been a laugh and smartass remark. "Who the fuck is in here?"

I heard Rocco's voice. "Are you two fuckers actually fucking in the shower?"

I shut my eyes when I heard Connor walk through the bathroom. "What's goin' on Rocco?" He must have seen the clothes on the floor because I heard him swear. "Jesus, do you two ever quit it?"

Rocco laughed. "Does this mean we can watch?" I heard Connor smack him on the head. "Fine, it was just a question."

Murphy removed my hand from his mouth. "Do you two know what privacy is? We're tryin' ta have a moment here and we can't do that while you two are right outside." I gave a little moan and he turned and pushed into me.

Connor grunted. "Please tell me you're not doin' it while I'm tryin' ta talk to ya Murph."

Murphy smiled pushing harder into me watching as I bit down on my lip trying not to make a sound. "Maybe I am which is the perfect reason for you two to get the fuck out of here. Darcie's tryin' not to make any noise but I don't know how long she's gonna make it." He gave one last push and I shuddered against the wall letting out a soft moan I had been holding back.

I slid off of Murphy and steadied myself against the wall before hitting him in the chest. "That wasn't funny." I ran my hands down his chest and crouched down until I was level with his best friend. I rose my eyes to his and blew a light breath along his shaft quickly standing. I pushed part of the curtain aside and grabbed a towel. Once I wrapped it around myself I stepped out of the shower facing Connor and Rocco. "Knock next time."

* * *

**A/N: So I was lazy and wrote a short chapter. Hopefully there'll be a longer one up tonight. If not my apologies. I've probably passed out on my couch watched the 24 hour marathon of A Christmas Story.**

**Happy Holidays to All.**

**Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukah and a Blessed Yule.**

**Thanks to my reviewers:**

**Misty Days**

**and**

**penscratch**

**As a side note the song Murphy sings is known as The Salley Gardens. Unfortunatly I can't type in the web address but if you want to see the english translation if you google: Gort na Saileán , click the first page. **

** Happy Trails  
**


	7. Guns and Undercover Whores

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Nada. Zilch. Zero percent. Zip. Nil.**

**You get the picture.**

* * *

I watched as Connor spoke to Smecker on the phone. Murphy had been a little miffed that I teased him and left but he was over it. He had his arms wrapped around my waist and was watching his brother intently while Rocco was rewrapping the bandages on his hand so he could hold a gun.

"You can get in touch with us from this number." Connor told Smecker my number. "Hold on, I'll have Darcie just say hi so she can tell your voice."

I took the phone from Connor. "Hello Agent Smecker."

"Please, call me Paul." His voice was pleasant although there was a slight strain on it. "You're okay with this whole situation?"

"Can't do anything about it. I think what they're doing is right in the long run. Plus what can I do? I've known them for most of my life, I won't abandon them now."

There was a pause on the other end. "You're in love with one of them aren't you?"

I smiled at the phone. "Yes, as a matter of fact."

"Murphy?"

"You're quite good at this Paul. Sure you're not in the BAU?"

He gave a short laugh. "Too much stress for what I'm looking for. I'll get in contact with you later; see if we can compare notes."

"That'd be nice; I'll give the phone back to Connor." I handed the phone off with a smile.

Murphy poked my sides. "What's with the smile? Just so you know Smecker doesn't like the ladies."

I scrunched my nose at him. "What do I want with an FBI agent when I can have a vigilante all to myself?"

Murphy smiled and gave me a soft kiss. "You know, you really are somthin' else."

I turned in his arms nipping his ear. "So you tell me."

Connor hung up and turned me from Murphy. At first I thought he was just breaking us apart until I saw his face was dead serious. "Darcie I have a question for you."

I raised a finger to my head in mock salute. "Yes, sir?"

. "Why do you have this?" He opened one of the kitchen drawers and pulled out a Lady Smith & Weston.

I took the gun from his hand. "Because I feel safer owning a gun?"

Murphy took the gun from me. "What in hell would possess ya ta keep it in a kitchen drawer?"

I crossed my arms. "I don't usually keep it there. I was cleaning yesterday and knew you two would be snooping around. I didn't want one of you to grab it when you were angry and blow someone away. It's fuckin' hard to get blood off these floors." I pointed around the kitchen. "Truthfully this was the last place I thought you two would snoop around."

Murphy let out a sigh handing me back his gun. "I just can't believe I never knew."

Connor nodded in agreement. "You know how to shoot it?"

I gave him a look of disbelief. "You think I'd own a gun without knowing how to shoot it? This was my sweet sixteen present from Patrick. He was just starting up and got this as a freebie. He took me to the range and I still keep up with going to shoot it. And don't bother asking, it's not registered. Can you believe it? I'm a big girl with a gun." I rolled my eyes heading to my bedroom to put it away. I opened the drawer of my bedside table and pulled out my ankle holster.

I slid the gun back in noticing Murphy watching me from the doorway. "What happened that you needed a gun?"

I sighed turning to him. "Murphy, nothing happened. I told you, Pat just gave it to me because he forgot about my birthday until the morning of. Nothing more."

He stretched out on my bed folding his arms behind his head and looked at me. "You said you feel safer having it."

I put my hands on my hips. "You of all people shouldn't lecture me about owning a gun. So what if I feel safer? I'm not scared to go on the streets; I've lived here my entire life. I've got some common sense, thanks. I just like knowing I have a gun around in the event I ever need one." I smiled moving onto the bed and slid myself on top of him, keeping myself up by my elbows. "You're really worried about me."

He rolled his eyes. "Of course I am. Any idiot in his right mind would know to be worried about you."

I slid my arms around his neck kissing him soundly on the lips. "Glad to know you're my idiot."

He smiled rolling us over so he was on top. "Always yours love. But it's not very nice ta call me an idiot." He began tickling me and kissing me in between.

I was gasping for air between giggles. "Murphy! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I give up, you're a genius."

He paused, hovering over me. "And?"

I opened my eyes letting a lazy smile play across my face. "And I love you."

He nodded. "Good. That's all I ever need ta hear before I go." He gave me a lingering kiss and headed out the door to pack up for tonight.

* * *

I stretched in the kitchen putting away the last of the food. I did a twirl and laughed. Connor, Rocco and Murphy decided after hitting Papa Joe's tonight they were going to New York until things calmed down a bit. They'd stay there for a few days before deciding their next move. I was a bit upset about this news but knew they would come here immediately after possibly with a new plan if everything went perfectly smoothly. After all, Paul had pointed out the Russian Mafia was visiting. He could lead the Boston PD to believe the hit was done by Russians who where trying to pretend the 'Saints' were really responsible. In the middle of this entire bout of chaos I was actually calm.

I stopped mid-pirouette when the phone rang. I wasn't expecting any calls beside Paul but I didn't think he would call until after the boys were back. I picked up the phone cautiously. "Hullo?"

"Darcie is that you?"

"Paul? I wasn't expecting you to call until later. What do you need?"

"We have a problem." His voice was high and rushed. "Can I swing by and pick you up?"

I rose to my feet. "Of course I just need to grab my coat. Where are you?"

"Pulling up to your building right now." He paused. "Darcie?"

I didn't like that pause. "Paul?"

"Bring a gun if you have one."

I heard a click and he hung up. I flew to my bedroom and locked up moving faster than I'd ever thought possible.

* * *

Paul was doing about 90 when he suddenly stopped dead and jumped out of his car. I scrambled to unhook my seatbelt and followed him into the side entrance of Viktoria's nightclub.

"Paul, don't fuckin' walk away. What do you mean they're walkin' into a trap?" I screeched to a halt when I came through the doors. Around forty men were shimming into dresses and wigs. And they were _beautiful._ The only way I could tell they weren't women was the flat chests and special underwear.

Paul looked at me with a smile waving his arms about. "Welcome to Viktoria's. Home of the worlds most beautiful drag queens."

"Paul, always the charmer." An elegant black man wearing a purple velvet gown gave Paul a light kiss on his cheek then tried rubbing the lipstick off. "Oh sorry sweetie, I really need to get new lipstick."

Paul just laughed. "Better to leave your mark." He pointed to me and back to the man. "Darcie, I'd like you to meet Viktor, or Viktoria as he's known."

I gave a smile and a wave. "Viktor Viktoria?"

Viktoria smiled. "Different spelling and a slight different concept. I didn't start off as a woman darling." He took my hand and spun me in a circle. "Look at the body on this one. What I wouldn't give for such a firm ass."

I blushed deeply and turned to Paul. "As nice as this is would you like to explain to me why we're not busting down Papa Joe's door and rescuing our boys?"

Paul smile slightly faltered but came back quickly. "We can't go in without a plan. I made a few calls and found a couple of entertaining girls showing up at Papa Joe's wouldn't be out of the ordinary. And since none of them swing my way I thought it would be best to go in drag. I brought you along because I know you'd kill me if you weren't in on it. So it's disguise time. Ladies do your job."

Viktoria dragged me into a chair while Paul walked off followed by a man who if I didn't know where we were would have passed for one of the most attractive J. Lo look alikes I'd ever seen.

Fifteen minutes later we were done. Viktoria hadn't spun me around but was putting the finishing touches on my lip stick. He looked me over with a smile. "Sweetie, have you ever thought of changes professions? Because you make one hell of a whore."

He spun me around and I gasped at my reflection. My eyes zeroed in first on my lips. They were a rich burgundy with light liner around them. Never in my life had I ever used lip liner, I thought it was pointless and took too much time. First thing in the morning I was buying myself new makeup. I'd probably call Viktoria for help. My eyes were smoky and lined with exotic little twists at the end. My black hair was pulled to the sides in flirty pigtails. I looked down at my clothes seeing them for the first time. I was pretty much thrown into new cloths without a second glance. I was wearing a red and black plaid shirt, part school girl, part gothic girl with white knee high socks and paten leather shoes. On top I was wearing an oriental patterned corset over a white button up shit. I looked in the mirror again making an O with my lips. Viktoria was right. I made a pretty nice whore.

"Well, well, well. I think you fit the catholic school girl fantasy perfectly. Well, not for me. Catholic school boys were more my thing."

I turned and my jaw dropped as I saw Paul. He was in strappy, platform FMP's and black stockings. He wore a black cocktail dress with a scoop neck and a pink scarf tied around his neck. His nails pushed up his large sunglasses and he has a light brown, curly wig on. "Well. That's a change."

He put on a falso soprano voice when he next spoke. "We'll figure a proper story in the car." He kissed his dresser and Viktoria. "I promise I will return these tomorrow." He linked arms with me and sauntered to the door. "Come on beautiful, it's time to test how good of an actress you are."

Paul pulled his car to a halt and we started walking up. "Know any language besides Italian so you can seem ignorant?"

I gave him a look. "Gaelic and Polish."

He thought about that for a moment and shook his head. "Not the Gaelic that may seem suspicious. Go with the Polish. Hopefully it won't get to that point. I don't want you in too deep. Two whores at once might seem a bit much." He paused at the door. "How did you learn Polish growing up with all the Irish?"

I shrugged and rang the doorbell. "My ma was Polish. She taught that to me, Da taught me Gaelic and they both came together to teach me English."

Paul turned us both around and listened to the door open.

"Hullo."

Paul turned around gently, making sure I followed suit. "Joey Bevo sent us over for entertainment."

"Listen baby. Tonight ain't the night for this shit. It's really hittin' the fan in there." He paused looking us over. His jaw seemed to loosen as I licked my lips. "Bevo's so fuckin' great. Always sending us primo box."

His eyes returned to Paul seeming to take in every detail of his legs. If I could only say one thing for Paul it was that I would kill for legs like his.

Paul rubbed up against the door thug. "You look like you could use a quickie." He pulled my arm and dragged me closer. "This here is Natasha, she's very new. Joey thought you boys might like to break her in a bit. He thought threesomes would relax everyone down from this chaos." Paul slid his manicured fingers down my face. "Isn't she just gorgeous?" He turned back to the thug kissing him full of the lips with obvious tongue. It took all I had not to smile picturing the thugs face if he knew he was making out with a man. Paul sucked on his bottom lip finally letting it go.

The thug stared at him then at me and opened the door. "Okay, let's go." His voice was slightly higher than before and I saw Paul smirk.

Paul latched onto my hand like I was a little girl, following Door Thug.

Around the corner another one of Papa Joe's men appeared gun in hand. He saw all of us and stopped. "Gino! What the fuck is this?"

Gino raised his hands. "Come on man, just five minutes. I haven't gotten laid in a week."

The other covered his face with his free hand. "If I die 'cause you're getting a piece of ass, I'll come back and beat you to death with a big rubber dick."

Gino laughed and led us up the stairs into the master bathroom.

Paul lay me down on the floor next to him. He lifted his dress to reveal a garter belt Gino gave a moan and bent down to touch Paul. When he was in position Pau kicked Gino hard in the nuts knocking him against the wall. From his purse he drew out his gun and shot Gino in the head staining the periwinkle walls with blood and bone fragments.

Paul nervously stood up. "It's on now. It's on." He lifted me to my feet and we hurried back down the stairs.

We rounded the corner and there stood Papa Joe's henchman who had yelled at Gino. He looked me over with a small smile. "There a two for one deal here?"

In a flash I stole my gun from my bag and shot him right through the heart. I knew he was dead before he hit the floor.

Paul gave stepped next to me forcing me to look at him. "What happened to you?"

I shrugged. "Nothing. I just learned how to shoot."

He shook his head. "No one learns to shoot that well without something having happened."

I stared down at the body. "When I was thirteen I was walking home with three of my friends when we were grabbed. We were taken down an ally and got the shit beat out of us by a bunch of drug dealers. I hadn't realized what my friends had gotten mixed up in. They never told me. There were two dealers and they told the girls how much they had fucked up. Then they got a good look at me and realized I had nothing to do with it. The first one gave me a smile that still wakes me up at night. 'Well it looks like you can send the message around that Freddy K. is not to be messed with.' With that the second dealer shot each of the girls in the head and ran away laughing." I gave a shuddering breath. "I was trying to do CPR, anything I could think of. I staggered out of the alley covered with the blood of my friends. The first thing I could thing of was to go to the police. The brothers of the three girls tracked the two dealers down and killed them themselves. The police turned a blind eye and let it go. I don't talk about it." I looked up at him. "I got a gun. I felt better, that's the end of it. Don't tell them. I don't want them to know."

He gave me an awkward hug that still managed to make me feel better. "Of course not. It's not my place." He turned and noticed a man sitting in an arm chair. He drew his gun, stepped closer and paused. "This guy's throat is slit."

A pistol came down and whipped Paul in the head. Paul crumpled to the ground without so much as a sound. The man holding the pistol came toward me and I dropped the gun.

"Il Duce." I breathed the name out falling to my knees. This was the man the boys had described. One man, six guns.

* * *

**A/N:**

**I'm a sucker for the dramatic pauses...**

**Thanks to my reviewers**

**Misty Days: I didn't pull it off well but I tired…**

**Penscratch: Yes I know, awkward awkward. As for why no door locking…well Murphy seems a bit too preoccupied to remember. And a bit of an exobitionist.  
heat: yeah Murphy just seemed to me like he would keep going at it…**

**Anon-thee-moose: hey a short review is still a review, and boy I love my reviews.**


	8. The Smoking Guns

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Leftover Chinese and Diet Dr. Pepper for breakfast should prove that.**

* * *

"You've heard of me little girl." Il Duke smiled behind the cigar clench in his teeth. To my surprise, he had a rich brogue.

"Please, don't do this. You must have seen what they've done. They're protecting the city, there's nothing wrong with that." I was still frozen in place.

"I thought as much. You are with them." He looked down at what I was wearing with a shake of his head. "Does your father know you dress like this?"

"If he knew who I was helping he would not care." I was keeping my voice level looking at the man who would probably kill me without a second though. Well maybe not. Paul had told me all he had leant from Augustus. Il Duke's only conditions of killings had been no women or children. Here's to hoping that was true.

He lifted me by the elbow leading me toward a back room. "Tell me lass, what are the names of these 'Saints'?"

I turned a face to him. "You'd kill without knowing who they are?"

He tightened his grip leading me down the small staircase behind the door. "Lassie, you are in no position to insult me, now be a good girl, and answer the question."

I gave a little wince. "David Della Rocco, the Italian. Long hair a bit of a moron, joined them after the death of the nine Russians. The other two, the real 'Saints', are the MacManus twins, Connor and Murphy."

Il Duke paused for a moment on the step. He leveled his gun at my head. "Do not say a word lass, not one whisper."

At the bottom of the stairs, the door was slightly open revealing Connor and Murphy kneeling before a chair praying. Rocco was sitting in the chair pennies gleaming bright over his eyes. His hair was matted with blood and in that second I truly comprehended, he was dead. It hadn't bothered me that the three of them were out killing but now Rocco was dead. What if it had been Connor or Murphy? I gave a little cry as Il Duke forced me to the floor on my knees. Both Murphy and Connor spun around their guns drawn, pausing in their prayer. Their eyes momentarily flicked to me but kept on Il Duke.

Il Duke put away his gun walking forward, completing the prayer. "That our feet may swiftly carry out thy command. So we shall flow a river forth to thee and teeming with souls shall it ever be." He made the sign of the cross over Rocco's body. "E nomini patri, et Fili e spiritu sancti." He put his hands on the boys' faces a sad smile spreading across his face.

"Da?" Connor's voice shook raising a hand to the leather clad one on his cheek.

Il Duke slowly nodded. "Yes my boys."

I crawled forward looking at Murphy's left arm. It was covered in blood and hanging at an odd angle. I touched his arm gingerly and he looked down at my hand. "It's broken nothing to worry about." He looked up seeing me for the first time. "Darcie?"

I started shaking. "Murphy." My voice shook and I could feel tears streaming down my face.

He moved an arm around my shoulders. "It's okay. It's going to be okay." He moved his lips to my ear. "Why are ya dressed like a lady of the evenin'?"

I hit him in the chest watching him attempt to smile. "I came to save you, you stupid moron." I pointed to Connor. "And you too. What were ya thinkin'? That's a great plan, break into a house of a man who knows you're after him."

Il Duke gave a small laugh. "She sounds like your ma."

Murphy winced. "Ah, don' say that."

Il Duke gave his son a stern look. "Tell me you're makin' right by this lass Murphy."

A smile grin crept across Connor's lips. "Oh he's doin' right by her."

Il Duke smacked his son on the head. "Was I talkin' to you Connor?" He turned to me lifting my chin up with a finger. "Let your heart get away from you I see. Well I can promise you, you're heart couldn't find a safer place lass." He stood looking around him. "Come on, we need to get out of here." He turned back to me. "Was that other woman with you?"

I gave a small smile. "I wouldn't call Paul a woman but yes, he's the one that found out this was a set up."

Murphy stood up pulling me against him, glancing down at my outfit. I saw a small smile appear in his eyes.

I turned. "Oh no. Do not even think about it at all. I don't dress like this."

"Love; if you dressed like this I would have locked you in your room before I left."

Connor jabbed his brother in the back. "Less of this, we have to get out of here." He took a last look backwards and crossed himself. "We need to make a plan."

I touched a finger to his temple watching him wince. "And get you both cleaned up."

* * *

It was close to midnight when we finally relaxed. We took Paul back to the club leaving him in Viktoria's care. Viktoria had told me to keep the clothes saying they were new and Robin, who they had been ordered for, decided he didn't want to take the schoolgirl approach. Murphy had given a wide smile when he heard that. They made a quick stop at my apartment to gather their things and gave me time to grab some clothes and my first aid. Now we were in the small motel room their father had been renting. He had told me not to call him Mr. MacManus or Il Duke, but Damien. Nice of him considering he had threatened me with a gun just a few hours before.

I had given Connor stitches and made a splint for Murphy's arm. For now that was the best I could do with Murphy, I made him promise to go to the clinic the next day to get it checked out. Damien was sitting in an armchair lighting one of his cigars. Connor way laying on his stomach on one of the beds while my head lay on Murphy's shoulder on the pull out couch. He had fallen asleep moments before but Connor and I remained awake speaking to Damien.

Connor rested his chin on a fist fighting to keep his eyes open. "How far are we goin' with this, Da?"

Damien leaned forward in his chair looking at us. I felt Murphy move and knew he was awake and paying close attention. "The question is not 'how far?' The question is do you possess the constitution, the depth of faith to go as far as needed?"

I felt Murphy squeeze my arm and Connor nodded.

Damien smiled at the three of us. "Now get some sleep. We'll speak more in the morning."

* * *

It's been three months since Rocco was killed. The brother's haven't killed since then, but Papa Joe's trial was starting today. There was a knock on the door and I slowly opened it.

Murphy stood on the other side sunglasses in place. "You can still back out Darcie. We don' need you for this."

I motioned him in. "I said I was with you one hundred percent. I meant it then and I still mean it."

He gave a sigh taking a seat at the kitchen table and rubbed his wrist. He had just gotten the cast off a few days ago. "Good thin' this was my left arm. Only thin' that hurts anymore is the wrist. Got a bit stiff in that stupid cast."

I bent forward from behind him wrapping my arms around his neck. "Are you sure you're okay?"

He gave one of my hands a squeeze and stood up, removing himself from my grip.

Things hadn't turned out the exact way I had hoped. Da had come back from Long Island and promptly signed the deed to the bar over to me. Aunt Megan had finally convinced him he should spend his retirement in Ireland and the next month they were gone. Da still called every day or every other to check up on how things were. I made Patrick my main bartender, which gave him a legitimate job so he wasn't wasting all his time in his basement looking for buyers. Damien and his boys were reunited and seemed to take it better than I would have. The boys just accepted this was their father and welcomed him into their lives immediately. I would have been a lot colder and more skeptical but that was just me. Of course, even I quickly warmed to him. Damien had given me a father figure to have around and he really was an amazing person. You could defiantly see where the boys got their bad habits and charm when Damien was around. They were at the bar just as they always had been, although Damien spent more time in the neighborhood talking with those his own age. Murphy and I saw each other on occasion but it all had seemed to go back to square one.

Murphy helped me into my jacket. "I'm fine."

I turned searching his face. "Murph cut the shit. I know when you're lying."

He sighed sliding his sunglasses to the top of his head looking tired. "You're not going to see us for a while."

My heart fell but I kept my face impassive. "I figured as much. Where are you headed?"

Murphy looked confused. "You're not gonna argue?"

I shook my head. "I've tried all I could to understand you Murphy. We spent years dancing around each other and then I think something actually happened. When this whole mess started, you said you wanted to see me more. Then we do and we end up sleeping together. Since then, for three months now, it's been back to the beginning. A quick kiss when you see me, a minute or two of messing around in the backroom at the bar and that's been that." I sighed. "As long as the three of you are going to be safe, that's enough for me. I love each of you in my own way; don't want to lose you by arguing and saying you should stay here."

"What do you mean in your own way?"

I walked out into the hall locking the door. "Connor's always been a brother to me; he's watched out for me and was there when I needed someone to rant to. Damien, your da, he's become kind of a father for me lately. He's talked to be about a lot of things, helping me figure out some problems." I turned giving him a small smile. "Then there's you. You I'm just in love with, not matter how I tell myself it's not the smartest thing in the world. But I did learn to stop thinking you're going to fall in love with me."

Murphy looked at me sadly. "I'm sorry."

I walked down the steps without looking back at him. "It's not your fault. There's just a difference between loving someone and being in love with them."

* * *

I walked through the glass doors of the courtroom smiling at the security guard. "Good morning."

He touched his hat smiling back at me. "More of good afternoon Miss."

I frowned at my watch. "Not again, this stupid watch keeps changing the time; I just can't get this little knob to pop out to fix the time." I held my wrist out to him giving him my best naive smile. "Can you help?"

I noticed his eyes flick over my body and suppressed the urge to stick my thumb in his eye as a slow smile spread across his face. "Of course."

I leaned forward giving him my arm and a full view down the front of my blouse. With my other hand, I took a stun gun out of my purse and gave him a good zap in the side. The guard slumped to the floor and I heard the others come through the doors behind me. Greenly walked quickly next to me turning off the metal detectors to let everyone pass without any annoying beeps or sirens.

Damien looked at the guard on the floor and took the stun gun from my hand. "How long will this keep him down for?"

I shrugged. "About ten minutes."

Damien bent down giving the guard another zap. "Twenty minutes is better."

Paul walked forward peeking into one of the courtrooms. "This is it?"

The five of us waited outside the door. The three MacManus' mouthed a prayer while Paul and I looked on. When they finished I saw Murphy glance at me then quickly turned to the door.

Connor walked to my other side lowering his voice so only I could hear him. "What's going on between the two of you? I haven't seen you two acting this cool toward each other since I opened my big mouth the day I found you in bed together. And that only lasted about an hour."

I shook my head. "It's nothing Con."

He squeezed my arm forcing me to look at him. "Darcie, that's a lie and you know it."

"We just came to terms with the fact there really isn't something strong between us."

"What?"

I looked at him with a sigh. "Connor. Nothing is left between Murphy and me. He admitted he loves me but he's not in love with me. And I've come to terms with that."

Connor shook his head in confusion. "Tell me there's a difference between loving someone and being in love with them, besides one word."

"There is a very big difference lad." Damien stepped closer to us and I realized he had been listening. "You can love anyone without it being intimate. You and your brother loved your friend Rocco and you love this girl here but only as a friend and in a family way. Darcie is in love with your brother and there's nothing she can do about it. What that means is she'll do anything for him without a second thought. If it means letting him go she'll do just that, but she'll still love him. Being in love is a blind trust. Even if you realize they can never love you back you'll do all you can to save them from getting hurt no matter how much it is killing you inside." He placed a hand to the side of my face. "I told you there was no safer place to keep your heart than with a MacManus. Well I've always believed our family to be romantic. Of course, romantic and safe are two different things. I'm sorry." He turned to the door and nodded. "It's time to go."

Paul stepped back allowing Damien to stand first before the doors with Connor and Murphy behind him. Greenly had gone back to take position at the front of the courthouse making sure we wouldn't find any unwanted visitors.

Murphy grabbed my hand as I was walking to stand by Paul. "Believe that I never meant to hurt you."

I nodded. "I know."

I let him pull me to his chest as he kissed me roughly. "I just don't want you to follow someone who won't do good by you."

I blinked. "What?"

He ran a thumb across my lips. "You'll see." He turned and stormed into the courtroom with his father and brother, jumping over the media boundary forcing everyone to shut off their cameras.

"You people have been chosen to reveal our existence to the world. You will witness what happens here today and you will tell of it afterwards." Damien roared from the front of the courtroom pulling the judge out of his seat. He led the judge to the regular seats while Murphy dragged Papa Joe from the witness stand to a kneeling position waiting for his father to finish his speech and take position.

Damien had lifted the face of a frail looking woman in the front row of seats behind the prosecution. I recognized her face for television reports. A week after returning from their honeymoon Lily Kingston had returned home from the grocery store to find her husband lying on the floor shot through the heart. She was here today to see her husband's killer brought to justice. She would defiantly not be disappointed. I watched as Damien spoke a few words to her smiling. He nodded and turned from her walking to his sons. He aimed his sawed off shotgun to the back of Papa Joe's head letting him know there was no way out. Connor leapt up on the defenses table while Murphy rose onto the prosecution. Both took out their inner guns turning to face the crowd before them.

I turned my head and nodded to Dolly. He nodded back and pulled the fire alarm making the halls echo the ringing

Connor aimed his gun around beginning a speech he had told me they had planned. "Now, you will receive us."

Murphy's voice rose to match his brother's voice, completely blocking out the fire alarm in the background. "We do not ask for your poor or your hungry."

"We do not want your tired or your sick."

A smile came to Murphy's lips. "It is your corrupt we claim."

"It is your evil, who will be sought by us."

"With every breath we shall hunt them down."

"Each day we will spill their blood till it rains down from the skies."

"Do not kill, do not rape, do not steal. These are principles which every man of every faith can embrace."

Connor's voice rose with anger as he pointed to Papa Joe. "These are not polite suggestions. They are codes of behavior and those that ignore them will pay the dearest cost."

Murphy pointed to those on Papa Joe's side of the courtroom. There are varying degrees of evil. We urge you lesser forms of filth not to push the bounds and cross over into true corruption, into our domain."

"For if you do, there will come the day when you look behind you and see we three. And on that day you will reap it."

Murphy gave a little bow with his gun. "And we will send you to whatever God you wish."

. They jumped off the table and I could feel Paul standing frozen next to me as we watched the three in a mixture of horror and fascination. Connor and Murphy took a place on either side of their father lowering their guns on either side of Papa Joe's head. As one, the MacManus' voices spoke their prayer.

"And shepherds we shall be. For thee, my Lord, for thee. Power hath descended forth from thy hand that our feet may swiftly carry out thy command. So we shall flow a river forth to thee and teeming with souls shall it ever be." Their voices broke apart to finish the prayer.

"E nomini patri," Damien's voice rang.

Connor's eyes were focused on Papa Joe's head. "Et Fili."

Murphy pulled back the hammer of his gun. "E spiritu sancti."

They shot in unison making Papa Joe's head disappear in a cloud of smoke and blood. I saw Murphy look up and our eyes locked for a moment before Paul and I opened the doors letting everyone inside spill out. No one noticed us but kept running down the stairs and out the courthouse doors. Damien and his sons rand out to us and Paul and I passed them their jumpsuits. Greenly flew past us to open the back door with Dolly to get the armored truck. Duffy appeared behind me with a shotgun in his hand.

Paul walked before me handing me a badge. I clipped it to the front of my jacket, smoothing down the skirt of my suit. Paul and I led the way out of the doors opening the back of the truck for our 'prisoners'. As an extra precaution, we had covered their heads with cloth bags but it was thin enough so they could easily see through it.

We were a few yards from where reporters were now grabbing anyone that had been inside the courthouse. I saw Lily Kingston and noticed her eyes had zeroed in on us. I turned behind me and realized she must have recognized the butterfly tattoo on Damien's hand as he grabbed the door to lift himself into the truck. Her eyes widened as she met mine. For a brief moment, I thought she was going to scream but she blinked and mouthed the words "Thank You" before being abducted by television reporters.

* * *

I rested my head against the window feeling the sun warmed glass bring some life to my face. I think it was time to start saving to go visit da. Despite all else I was still daddy's little girl. And this little girl desperately needed her daddy.

The car came to a sudden stop and I looked around. "Wait. This is Logan…" My voice trailed off as I looked around but no one said anything to me. "We're at an airport."

Paul would not meet my eyes. "They need to stay low for a while."

I nodded keeping my voice level even though my hands were shaking. "You're right." I knew they were going into hiding for a while, but I had been thinking more along the lines of hiding out maybe in Long Island or somewhere close. Not somewhere they had to fly to.

I got out of the truck with Paul earning an encouraging smile from Dolly. We walked to the back and opened the doors and the MacManus family hopped out with duffle bags in their hands. Damien kissed my forehead and said goodbye, moving on to talk with Paul.

Connor and Murphy stood before me not meeting my eyes. I gave an involuntary sniff willing myself not to cry. "Well? Don't I at least get a hug goodbye?"

Connor and Murphy both dropped their bags squeezing me tight. Connor let go of me first giving me a kiss. "Take care; you'll see us before you know it." He hurried off and joined his father.

Murphy held me tighter and I was scared to let go of him. I blinked back a few tears and moved my face from his shoulder. This was not fair. I didn't care if I was being selfish; I wanted them close by, not hundreds or thousands of miles away. I didn't even know how far they were or where they would be. In the back of my mind, I heard a small voice of reason. It didn't matter if I didn't think it was fair. All that mattered was that they would be safe. That thought gave me enough courage to look at Murphy and not some point over his shoulder. "Be careful. Take care of yourselves right?" I forced a small smile. "Don't keep away forever though. Otherwise you'll lose your bar tab."

He drew back slightly and held my face in his hands. "This is for the best, you know that right?" Before I could say anything, he gave me a soft kiss and I knew it was goodbye. He turned away and hurried through the doors with his father and brother.

We got back in the car and all it took was a hand on the shoulder from Dolly to make me crumble. "They're really gone aren't they?"

He didn't say anything to me. I doubt anyone really knew what to say. He just gave me shoulder a tight squeeze and looked back out his window.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Hope everyone had a good holiday. I know I'm sick of family now.**

**Thanks to my reviewers:**

**heat**

**MKOLO**

**iheartconnor**

**And**

**Misty Day**


	9. Remembering How to Fly

**Disclaimer: I'm saving my money. Mostly so, I won't be living off sour patch kids and soda for my college years. Not that that is necessarily a bad thing…**

**Nevertheless, it once again goes to show, I own absolutely nothing.**

* * *

"It's been six months sweetie." Molly gave my hand a squeeze. "It's okay to bitch them out."

I crossed my arms, propping my feet up on the chair next to her. In the six months, since Murphy, Connor, and their dad had been gone I had gotten one letter. The best part? No postmark. They had sent something to Paul and inside that was a letter for me. Paul had refused to tell me where the postmark was from. Paul had gone back to New York shortly after the Saints had left leaving me bored and slightly cranky. Nevertheless, I had Molly and the bar. And the night the boys left, I had taken advantage of the bar and Molly had gotten me back to the room before someone could take advantage of me.

The letter was nothing special. Just a letter stating they were all fine and hoped I was doing well. It had been sent a month after they had left and I hadn't heard anything since then.

I lifted my head to check the electronic boarding schedule. Da had told me to fly over for Christmas and the New Year and I accepted. Molly had driven me to the airport, ironically the same one where I had said goodbye to Murphy. I was looking forward to Ireland. Although Da had been born there, I had never been. He'd gone there on holiday once or twice when I was young but my ma and I had stayed home or gone somewhere within the country. This was my first time going out of the country. I was nervous but also relaxed. I was going away from Boston for a while, for a few weeks I would be away from the bad memories and get a fresh perspective and a chance to clear my mind.

"That's your plane." Molly stood next to me putting a hand to her stomach with a smile. She was pregnant with her first kid, just three months along. I had told her I could just get a cab but she waved my words aside saying she needed to get out of the house while she could still move around easily. "You know Christmas isn't going to be the same without you here."

I smiled giving her a hug. "I know, but I promise phone calls, e-mails, and lots of pictures. It's going to be weird not seeing Connor and Murphy dress up as Santa's this year."

Molly laughed walking with me toward the forming line to board. "Yeah, watching them fight over who would be Santa and who would be the elf was an amusing tradition. I still remember when we had to help with that Christmas Pageant as St. Patrick's."

I cringed and laughed. "Oh that was terrible. I still have pictures somewhere. You and Connor were Mary and Joseph. Murphy was a wise man and I was the head angel. Of course I'm the one that had all those lines to memorize."

Molly smacked my arm. "At least you didn't have to sing a lullaby while Connor kept laughing."

I smiled. "I still remember the night before the performance Connor and Murphy started a small football game using the baby Jesus as a football. Of course the head popped off and it took and hour to figure out how to get it back on without the head popping off every five seconds."

Molly laughed gasping for air. "Oh I think my favorite part was catching you and Murphy making out behind the bushes."

I winced. "Okay, enough memories thanks. I think I would have died if da' ever found out I had made out outside of a church."

Molly seemed to search my face for something. "Still too early to joke about Murphy?"

I sighed. "I don't know. I'm just a little miffed at both of them. I mean one letter is nothing. I would have expected this from Murphy; we were trying to distance ourselves. But Connor knows how I get. I would have expected more."

Molly gave me one last hug before I boarded. "Who knows? Maybe you'll come back and they'll be sitting on your front steps."

I rolled my eyes hiking my bag up on my shoulder. "Then I'll just tell them they waited too long and I closed their tab and banned them from the bar."

* * *

I walked out of the airport exhausted. Transatlantic flights were an absolute bitch.

"Darcie, my girl." Da walked forward giving me a hug. "H-h-how's Boston been?"

I smiled at him. For some reason ever since he left Boston, his tourettes had been kept to a minimum. His stuttering was still around but not as bad. I had asked a friend about it and he said the change of scenery might had gotten rid of a stress factor that bad his tourettes so bad. Whatever it was Da looked good and happy. That's all that mattered. "Everything is going really well Da. Patrick sends love along with everyone else. Molly has been getting into knitting and she gave me a sweater for you. You'll love it."

He smiled and led me to his car. "Ah that girl has always had a talent. She been thinkin' of m-m-many names yet?"

I shook my head. "Not yet. Gary's been too busy watching her like a mother hawk to actually discuss anything yet. He's still in shock over this whole thing. He'll be better in a week or two."

"Good good. Your Aunt Megan's home making d-d-dinner. Wait till you meet all of your cousins out here." He gave me a wink. "Got a few surprises for ya as well."

I leaned my head into the headrest. "That's nice da. I just need to get some sleep before anything. Jet lag is a bit worse than I thought it would be."

* * *

I blinked at the sun that was creeping through the curtains. I had gotten to the house, said hello to my Aunt Megan and went to bed. I looked at my watched and groaned. It was eight in the morning. At least it was Saturday. Da had told me on the way that he and Aunt Megan slept in late but I could take the car or just go for a walk if I liked.

I looked around and found Aunt Megan had put all my clothes away in a drawer for me. I rifled through the doors finding a comfortable emerald sweater and a beat up pair of jeans. It was warm for the time of year and I didn't plan on being out for too long so I decided to forgo a jacket.

I shut the door carefully behind me holding a mug of coffee close to my chest and pocketed the spare house keys. I looked around noticing only one other house had its lights on. Seemed everyone here liked to sleep late. I trudged through the grass coming to a stop at the top of the hill and took a seat. I gave a little shiver feeling the cold earth beneath me but the view was worth it. We were less than a quarter of a mile from the ocean. I watched the fog roll in, in a lazy way. I smiled thinking how I was in a postcard worthy location.

Da had been humming Christmas carols while Aunt Megan sang along as she set out dinner. I had declined dinner instead going directly to be but staying awake long enough to listen to the carols and memorize a few. The Gaelic made everything sound better, and more appealing. Sure, it threw me off but it was something different. The only carol I ever knew in Gaelic was The First Noel. I remember driving everyone crazy by singing it constantly when I learned it. Of course, it had been in the summer so that may have been the reason. Once Christmas hit everyone would urge me to sing it, and apologize for complaining earlier.

I started humming it as I watched the fog disappear in some spots.

"_An Chéad Nollaig Mhór, bhí cor aingeal Dé  
Sa spéir go ceolmhar a fogairt dea-scéil  
Mbun cúraim a dtréad, bhí aoirí na mbán  
'S d'airíodar an scéala, dea-mhéinne 'gus grá"_

I looked around feeling slightly foolish but pleased I remembered it all. It had been a long time since I sang it and sometimes I would lose myself in my own voice. I took a sip of my coffee swaying to the music in my mind as I sang along.

"_Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel  
Rugadh an lá seo Rí Iosrael_

_Do dhearcadar i gcéin, an réalt lonnrach breá  
In oirthear an spéire, gan néal gan scáth  
Agus líon an saol, de ghlé-sholas óir  
'S lean uirthi a soilsiú, idir oíche 'gus ló_

_Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel  
Rugadh an lá seo Rí Iosrael"_

I searched my mind for the last verse but came up blank. I took a sip of my coffee placing the mug beside me and layback in the grass with my eyes closed continuing to hum the song.

"_Do bhreoigh an réalt, triúir éigeas gan cháim  
thíortha i gcéin, thar sliabh 'gus thar má  
A d'iarraidh an Rí, bhí 'na soithe mór-chlú  
'S do lean siad de shíor, an rinn réilteann iúil"_

I gave a start and sat up not daring to look behind me. A few hours in another country and I had already made a spectacle of myself. Probably one of the neighbors coming to make fun of me.

I refused to turn around, still mortified. "Sorry to disturb you. I just got caught up in the view I suppose."

I saw a pair of feet next to me and watched as the man sat down next to me. "Didn't disturb me one bit. Always liked to hear you sing."

I felt my eyes widen as I took in the sight of Murphy grinning at me leaning back on his arms. "Holy Mother of God."

Murphy pretended to frown. "You know I'm not sure if that's a good reaction or not. I was plannin' on walkin' over and knocking on the door until you got up and answered. Your Da said you'd most likely be up early. Didn't think you'd be up this early."

I scrambled to my feet forgetting my mug and started walking toward the house.

Murphy caught up and stood before me not letting me pass. "Jesus woman. Is that the kinda greetin' I get?" He gave me a smile. "I was hopin' for at least a kiss."

I narrowed my eyes and punched him in the eye. He clutched it and staggered back. "Six months without a damn word, besides that lousy letter, and you expect me to just smile and say hi? You're lucky I didn't knee you Murphy MacManus."

"Now I'm glad Murph decided to say hullo first." I watched and Connor walked next to his brother shaking his head with a smile.

Murphy winced and touched the area around his eye. "Did ya have ta punch me that hard?"

I smack his hand away from his eye touching it lightly. I took comfort in knowing it was going to bruise nicely. "Well maybe if you took five minutes out of your lives and wrote me a real letter or gave me a call to let me know you were at least alive I wouldn't have had to hurt you."

Connor lifted me from behind giving me a hug. "Come on, Da'll be pleased ta see you. And you still have ta meet ma." He pointed to the house closest to us. Ironic that I was living this close to the people I was hoping to get out of my mind during this little vacation.

I reluctantly smiled. "Good then I can tell her that her sons need to learn decent manners."

I elbowed Connor in the stomach. If I was a bitch to one brother, it was only fair I was a bitch to the other. He promptly dropped me and I started running to the house. I heard them running and swearing behind me. I had spoken to their mother once or twice during the holidays when she called. She was a nice woman unless she was on the phone with her sons. Then she was my hero. She was the only person I think the boys were ever afraid of. Even thousand of miles away she held power over her sons.

I felt something grab me and tumbling to the ground rolling through the hard ground. Murphy was on top of me struggling to keep me down. "Come on Darcie, that's not funny. Ma's already in a bit of a bad mood."

Connor nodded from behind his brother. "She already mad at us."

"What did you do?" I leaned up as far as Murphy would let me. "Can I at least stand up? It's a little cold down here and I think there's a rock in my back." Truth was I didn't feel comfortable being that close to Murphy. Well not the kind of comfort I could relax under. Just the comfort that made me stressed and considered forgiving him without a second thought.

Murphy rolled off of me and I took Connor's hand to get up.

The door opened and Damien walked out coming over to give me a hug. "Well if it isn't the little lass. How are you doin' my girl?"

I smiled. "Fine thank you."

He looked over my shoulder. "Feel better after attackin' the boys?"

My smile grew wider as I nodded. "Yes, defiantly better."

Connor was rubbing his stomach and Murphy was gingerly feeling the welt that was forming under his eye. I didn't plan on giving him a black eye. I was wearing rings and knew better. I wanted to hurt him, not make him go blind.

Damien led me through the door. "Annabelle we have a visitor."

A woman turned from the stove, hands on her hips. Annabelle MacManus was a stout woman who looked like she drank harder than her boys did. She gave me a smile and ushered me to sit. "Aye, you must be Darcie. Your da' and aunt have told me about you. Showed me pictures, but they don't do ya justice my dear." She frowned watching her boys enter. "I see those two caught up with you." She squinted at them and narrowed her eyes at me. "Did you do this to my boys?"

I nodded in an apologetic way. "Yes ma'am. I was upset. Your sons didn't write me a letter or call after they left and I've been worried for six months. I didn't even know where they were or if they were even alive." I met her eyes and it took all I could not to start laughing. "And Murphy greets me and expected me to throw myself on him. I was just showing them some manners. I'm very sorry if I overstepped my bounds ma'am."

She looked at her sons in shock. She walked over to them and hit both in the head. "No word? This is the girl who watched out for you yours entire time you were in that godforsaken place and that's how you repay her? This is the sweet girl who has wished me Merry Christmas and Happy Easter every year and this is how you treat her? Connor I really expected better of you. And Murphy." Her voice had turned to a growl and I stuck my tongue out at them from over her shoulder. "How dare you expect anything from her at all? No word and you try starting something with her immediately?"

"I didn't think. I mean I know it was six months." Murphy stuttered. "But what about Da? I mean he was gone for-"

Damien's eyes grew. "Oh no my boy, this is your problem. Don't drag me into this."

She turned to her husband and I saw Connor and Murphy smile as Annabelle turned her electric force to her husband. "Oh don't think we won't have another conversation on your leaving Mr. MacManus." She turned back to me with a sigh. "I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to just have a daughter."

"If she'd been anything like Darcie she's lucky she got us." Connor muttered and Murphy snorted.

Annabelle and I both turned with out eyes narrowed at the boys. Connor and Murphy's faces fell. It was one thing to have me mad at them. It was another to have their mother on my side. I was starting to really enjoy this.

* * *

Two hours later I was reclining on a blanket Murphy and Connor had spread on the ground and was staring at the sky. "It really is beautiful here."

"Its has its moments." I felt Murphy's eyes on me but refused to turn to him. "Hey Con?"

I could picture Connor nodded to his brother and heard him walk away. I slowly turned to look next to me. "Murphy…"

He rolled on top of me and kissed me without letting me finish.

It took a second for my mind to process that before I pushed him off. I mentally kicked myself feeling how reluctant I was to do so. "No." I shook my head sitting up with my knees to my chest.

Murphy knelt next to my brushing the hair from my face. "Why?"

I looked at him in disbelief. "I'm upset. Murphy, six months is a long time. Plus the face you admitted you weren't in love with me but you kept acting as if you were. I'm confused enough as it is. I came here because I thought I would get a chance to clear my mind out here. Of course you're naturally here and that plan is now a failure."

"You didn't get what I meant?"

I gave him a look. "Murphy my brain isn't working this morning so just spit out whatever it is you're trying to say."

"I am in love with you."

"What?!" I stood up so fast I nearly fell over but Murphy caught me before I fell back. I struggled in his arms. "Oh no. We are not playing this game. This is not funny Murphy. I only fall for that trick once."

"This isn't a trick." He sounded angry. "Haven't you realized why we left? Why I never wrote you?"

I narrowed my eyes stiffening in his arms. "Yeah, you're a prick."

He tightened his grip on my arm making me wince. "I'm being serious."

"So am I."

"I did it for you. It was what was for the best. I didn't want you ta waste your life following us while we went into hidin'. I didn't write you because I wanted you ta get on with your life. I figured I'd be out of your head in a month or two."

My jaw dropped. "Are you a moron? Murphy! We've known each other since we were sixteen. It would take a major head injury for me to forget you even if I wasn't in love with you, asshole."

I watched as a smile found its way to his face. He didn't look as tired as he did the day he left. He looked much more relaxed, other than the tension from having to argue with me. Ireland defiantly agreed with him. "You're still in love with me but you call me an asshole."

I pushed back from him but his hold on me was stronger than ever. I didn't like not being able to dislodge myself when I was actually angry with him. "I was only stating a fact. I'm an idiot and I'm in love with an idiot who I have been trying not to brood about for six months. Nine months ago, you said how you would have regretted never showing that you truly loved me and would have regretted never making love to me. Three months later, we were back to square one. Then six months ago, you left without looking back. So sorry if I didn't run into your arms the second I saw you. I was hurt nine months ago and it's still hurting. And it's going to keep hurting because if you really are in love with me you wouldn't have left me behind."

"I left you behind because I am in love with you. I wanted the best-"

"Don't say it Murphy. I swear I will leave right now if you think you know what's best for me."

He pulled me into a kiss and I didn't struggle this time. It wasn't a flirty kiss, just a solid truthful kiss. He reluctantly pulled back looking right into my eyes. "Believe me when I say I've missed you more than you can imagine." He sighed. "Not one day has gone by that I haven't thought about you. I've been driving Connor insane. Wonderin' what you were doin', where you were, what you were wearin'," his voice grew soft. "Picturin' you asleep." He shook his head swaying our bodies with the breeze that was rolling in from the water. "I picked up the phone every night ta call you and stopped. I wanted you ta get better, ta move on. But I didn't want ta call and hear someone else's voice pick up your phone. It took my six months ta realize how much you mean ta me. I never realized how lucky I was ta have you around all the time. Now that I haven't…well I've done a lot of thinkin'. I may not have realized I was in love with you before I left but I've realized it every second since I've been gone."

I forgot everything around me. I forgot I was in Ireland, in the middle of a field. I forgot it was winter and people might be looking out their windows. I forgot how angry I had been at Murphy. All I knew was we were here and that was what mattered. I pulled him to me releasing the six months of frustration, loneliness, and confusion. His mouth was slow to open as if believing this was a trick and the second he opened his mouth I was going to bite his tongue off. My hand slid up his back feeling the warmth of his body trapped in the wool of his sweater.

He slowly broke the kiss looking down at me. "So I get a second change?"

I nodded. "Whether you were in love with me before or not it doesn't matter. Let's just see where this takes us."

He smiled and brushed his thumb across my eyes causing my eyes to flutter. "Why do you do that when I touch your lips?"

I smiled leaning into him. "I can feel your heartbeat in your thumb when you do that."

He pulled me into a deep kiss making my toes curl in my shoes. "Want to know a secret?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Okay, what is it?"

"Connor and I both carry a picture of you in our wallets."

I leaned back from him. "That's a bit creepy. Wait, what picture is it?" I pat down his front pockets then leaned around him to grab the wallet from his back right pocket.

He smiled down at me as I flipped the wallet open looking fro a picture. I pulled out a picture that had been cut down to show Connor, Murphy, and I at the Christmas Pageant. It had been after it ended and the boys had lifted me onto their shoulders to get a full view of the enormous wings I had had to wear. "That's sweet, I was just talking about the Pageant with Molly the other day…wait what's-"

I saw another photo behind this one and gave Murphy a look. He seemed to pause for a moment but nodded letting me know I could look at it. I pulled the picture out staring at it in silence. It was a picture of Murphy and I asleep on the pull out couch the night at Damien's motel room. We had fallen asleep sitting halfway up but still in a slouching position. There was a blanket around me to keep me warm while my arms were wrapped around Murphy's middle. One of his arms was around my shoulders while the other held my waist beneath my own arm. We looked so peaceful.

One of Murphy's fingers ran along the edge of the photo. "Da took pictures of us while we were sleepin'. Guess he was tryin' to make up for the years he missed. He gave me this and I've kept it close." He slid the photos back into his wallet returning it to his back pocket. His left arm held my waist while his right hand raised my chin making me look into his eyes. "I always said you looked like an angel."

I moved his hand to my cheek smiling. "You said angels are perfect, I'm far from that."

He brought his lips close to mine hovering inches before me. "You're the closest to perfect I've known. Plus what kind of saint would I be without my own guardian angel?"

I met his lips with a smile. Here was to a second chance. The kiss slowly broke and Murphy lifted me up twirling me around. If every saint needed an angel, it seemed every angel needed a saint to catch them when they forget how to fly.

* * *

**A/N:**

**_This_ is the final chapter. Hope you enjoyed my little story. I know it was a bit shorter others, but that's how I write my fan fictions. Short and sweet.**

**Thank you to my reviewers:**

**heat: No I wouldn't end it there. That would be cruel. I'll just end it here and let you make your own fairy tale or not so fairy tale ending.  
**

**iheartconnor: I'd never end it without warning everyone. See I'm just sneaky...  
**

**h sloanx16: thankd for reviewing, glad to see you like this and Four Roses. I must be doing something right.  
**


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